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Elephant In The Fridge

Started by: dostaf (inactive)

"You can't ignore a turd in the swimming pool."

I like that.

I am chuffed with myself for thinking it up. So much so, that I had a bit of a google, as is my wont, to see if anyone else has writted it.

Well, if they have, they didn't tell google.

Whilst mooching, I found something I thought I'd like to share with the group (because I'm like that).

I know it's American, but I like it.

Healthy Swimming

From here: http://www.bobguskind.com/2008/07/31/directive-from-the-red-hook-pool-poop-is-bad/

'The Red Hook Pool has a reputation for being one of the tightest ships in the public pool system, despite the fact that we had a parental complaint of an alleged turd in the pool (specifically “some kind of excrement” from a teenager) a few weeks ago. The pool is so tightly supervised that more people are likely to complain about the rules than about things being awry with the pool. A special GL Correspondent sent us this photo discouraging poop, urine, dirt and germs in the pool. It specifically urges people not to use the pool if they have diarrhea. To repeat: Do not crap up the pool.'

'Alleged turd'

Started: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:31

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

It gets better.

I went to the sunset park pool less than 2 weeks on a tuesday around 5pm and there was an organized incident where about 30 teenage boys started diving and jumping into the pool all at the same time, over and over. The life guards couldn’t control them and two minutes later, police came out and shut down the pool–everyone had to leave. Thank goodness i happened to be in the middle of the pool with my two children when it started. When we came out, two of our towels were stolen. Now i have a bad taste in my mouth over sunset.

Here

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:37

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

She licked herself and her Children dry?

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:44

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

But wait. Your 'qoute' is stolen directly from the joke, so it isn't yours at all.


An news story

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:46

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

That would explain it.

Glad to see you're taking my nice new thread seriously.

I think this busted mythe has been mentioned before:

Pee indicator dye.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:47

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

I remember when we (School Party) went to the baths, a lecture was given about the dye afffetcing our trunks (Swimming, not nasal) and there would be a stain around the groin region if we took a slash in the pool. No one wore white speedo's which is a good job in case the stain dyed yellow.


Emails
May contain words not suitable for rain men or other gnashers of teeth.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:49
Last edited by Mac: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:51:49

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

'qoute'?



From the story:

Big Man wrote:

It's not unusual to see what locals describe as creeping water rats floating past you on the water at sittingbourse and sheerness pools. It goes with the territory and as long as you keep your mouth closed and shower as soon as you get home it's no big problem.

07 Mar 2012 4:38 PM


Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:51

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

Yes, your 'quote'.
I quote, "You can't ignore a turd in the swimming pool."

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:52
Last edited by Mac: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:53:28

Posted by: mache (inactive)

displacement has started

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:55

Posted by: walshy76 (inactive)

May contain words not suitable for rain men or other gnashers of teeth

by: Mac (8358)

oops @ extra i in second gratuitous.
It means, in this case, 'Uncalled for', particularly as this is a site Children visit.

Replied: 21st May 2012 at 18:21


hypocrite

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:55

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

Rain mannery abounds.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:56

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

But wait. Your 'qoute' is stolen directly from the joke, so it isn't yours at all.

The flat (appartment) one is a belter.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:57

Posted by: walshy76 (inactive)

Posted by: the_gwim_weaper (24248)
Yes, Children use this site.

Replied: 15th Jun 2010 at 16:28
Last edited by the_gwim_weaper: 15th Jun 2010 at 16:28:57


hypocrite

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:57

Posted by: mache (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 11:59
Last edited by mache: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:00:53

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

Susanna: You use me, you use Raymond, you use everybody.
Charlie: Using Raymond? Hey Raymond, am I using you? Am I using you Raymond?
Raymond: Yeah.
Charlie: Shut up! He is answering a question from a half hour ago!

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:00

Posted by: walshy76 (inactive)

by: Mac (10581)
No swearing, the censor will have his scissors out!

Replied: 11th Jul 2012 at 17:42



Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:03

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

Rain man commented again, I note.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:04

Posted by: walshy76 (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:05

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

I was thinking yon quote was from that Yank show with that Raymond who sounds ike Kermit the frog.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:06

Posted by: walshy76 (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:07

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

His shovel selling mail is rib ticklingly funny.
Not to be read if your ribs are showing, or you are fatigued in any way.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:09

Posted by: mache (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:12

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

Olympics Latest: In what has quickly become a symbol for the entire lead-up to the London games, a ‘Bombay trout’ was found in the Olympic pool today; the latest in a series of high-profile embarrassments for Lord Coe’s 2012 management team.

The turd, discovered this morning in the main swimming pool of the Olympic Park’s Aquatics Centre, was allowed to bob along in the waters for some time while staff disagreed over who’s responsibility it was to remove it.

“We’ve all here on short-term contracts,” said Lisa Thomas, 24, “and there’s no clause in there that covers me scooping out floaters.”

With the offending object finally removed, the focus of attention has since been on the culprit.

“It’s either a disgruntled staff member or a disgruntled member of the public who somehow got access,” said manager Geoff Burnside.

“One thing’s for sure; they’re disgruntled. No one’s been allowed to swim in here, so it’s not one of your kids having a Saturday morning accident in the local Lido. This was a planned, poolside squat-attack. We should be able to see who it was but we’re still waiting for G4S to install the security cameras.”

“Coe’s ordered the whole pool drained and refilled,” said one official who asked not to be named. “It’s a nightmare. I’d like to take the little (comment removed etc.) in for questioning myself. As it is, it will only have to face DNA testing. Then we’ll know for sure who is responsible for this mess.”

Story: Jasper Gibson


From off of the internet.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:16

Posted by: mache (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:19

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

Read the story entitled 'Lost' and think of 'some people off here' whilst doing so.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:21

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

The shovel e mail is a corker.

Sincerely NOT buying your shovel of hatred,

Mordecai Goldstein

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:21

Posted by: walshy76 (inactive)

: mache (12699)
Some shovel

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:12


now that is some....not as much as comes out of "some peoples" mouths on here, but its a lot



Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:22

Posted by: mache (inactive)

voices?

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:24

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

I wonder if rain man will post more useful tidbits.....
Oh.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:24

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

Anyroad:

Where does Harry Hill say anything about ignoring turds?

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:31

Posted by: mache (inactive)

good for roses but be aware of the pricks you may catch tetanus

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:35

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

Trug off!

This is about swimming pools, not gardens.

Any more and I'll show you a pic of a frog on a lily.

And Lily looks worried.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:39

Posted by: mache (inactive)

Sorry





Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:42

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

I've just found a belter.

Makes Gordon Brittas look sane.

WHAT ARE RECREATIONAL WATER ILLNESSES (RWIs)?
What is the first thing that pops into your head when you think about water safety?
Drowning? Slipping? Lightning? All good answers, and all are very important. But, did you
know that germs can contaminate swimming water? These germs cause RWIs that have
made many people sick.


Lightning?

Fecal incidents

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:47
Last edited by dostaf: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:52:14

Posted by: mache (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:52

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)



Notreet!

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 12:53

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

You hum it....

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 13:00

Posted by: walshy76 (inactive)

by:Mac (11702)

Then what are my stalkers posts have to do with this thread.
or the 'Major problems with Wiganworld! How about you???' thread, yet his remain. Hypocrite!

Replied: 6th Aug 2012 at 11:50





also thanks to the members that keep emailing the links

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 13:32

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 14:01

Posted by: Mac (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 14:03

Posted by: walshy76 (inactive)

gosh....excellent post, old boy

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 14:05

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

There was something charmingly septic about Colin.

I seem to remember one episode with a seage lorry.

He often ahd a big rubber glove on and ready for action.

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 14:06

Posted by: dostaf (inactive)

Replied: 18th Oct 2012 at 15:04

 

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