Eve of the eve Christmas Sale,

I know what you're thinking, You're thinking us shop keepers are extending the season by inventing new days to have a sale,
Not me my friends, this is a genuine sale,
1d arrow bars ( slightly out of date) half price 1/2d
tennis shoe whitening ( slightly yellow) 3d
pepsident Toothpaste, ( you'll wonder where the yellow went) wonder , 5 bob, use it on your tennis shoes to remove the yellow the tennis white left,

Christmas tree candles, 12d each,
fire extinguisher 10 bob,
daisy chain decorations 100 self sticky tapes for half a crown 2/6d
for big families, an octopus ( everyone gets a leg ) 1 Guinee

everything must go before the lock down,

Have you got any powdered toothpaste or Brylcream? Or anything for a farthing?

Have you got a tobacco licence?

yes indeed, as you walk in the door, there is a farthing bargain box with,
out of date, ever ready batteries, melted candles, clog irons, clog iron nails, brown paper bags with wet bottoms, wooden pegs with, one leg missing, family suit cases with no wheels on and loads of other , sought after products,
come on down,

Have you got any panic, Arfur, I know Tonker's not found anywhere that sells it yet - Thread

there is tobaccos under the counter brought in by Sir Francis himself, its duty free ( hush hush) and sold in toffee bags at 2d a twist,

We have panics jo anne , panics, cupics , jugics bottleics, al variations of ic's

there's nothing we don't have

Our main supplier is a,,
maniac

I've been very busy today taking Yorkie Bars to Kent, So I sold out of those,

and dont mention Wagon Wheels to me,

Specials this week are,
I've a couple of irons that go on argo cookers and they are running out fast but, just coming in are, electric irons, you plug them in a light bulb holder and they are state of the art, They'll be on sale Boxing day, so be early for those, Boxing day opening is 10am to 4 pm,

Arfur, I wonder if you are a distant relation of the Ashton-in-Makerfield's eccentric junk shop owner Johnnie (Moggie) Morris?

Yes Alan although he was a grumpy old sod, he learned me all about the retail industry, I still have some of his old stock, lead soldiers , rusty spades ,step ladders etc,

He got all his best stuf from Alladin's cave!

Sorry Arfur. Spent all my money on Christmas presents and goodies.
I'm totally skint, so no money for the sale