|In the quaint old town of Wigan,
Things are now quite reet,
There was chaos in the chippies',
And panic in the streets.
All the pie shops were deserted,
And all the pubs shut down,
Because there was a rumour
That Satan was in town.
Yes, the devil had come to Wigan
And the town was gripped by fear,
He was last seen walking down Wallgate,
On his way down to the Pier.
Wigan was a ghost town,
Especially after dark,
They say it was God's punishment
For selling Central Park.
But to everyone's amazement,
Just outside the market place,
Joe Rigby, who lived in Aspull,
Met the Devil, face to face.
Satan said: 'Don't you recognise me?
I'm the person everyone fears.'
Joe said: 'I've been married to your sister,
for nearly forty years.'