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A couple of jokes an a word from the wise

 
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Cyril



Joined: 07 Jul 2009
Posts: 2771
Location: Wigan

PostPosted: Fri May 22, 2015 12:53 pm    Post subject: A couple of jokes an a word from the wise Reply with quote

Drink driving test

A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped
by the police.

"What are those machetes doing in your car?" asks the
cop.

"I juggle them in my act."

"Oh, yeah?" says the doubtful cop. "Let's see you do
it."

The juggler gets out and starts tossing and catching
the knives. Another man driving by slows down to watch.
"Wow" says the passer-by. "I'm glad I quit drinking.
Look at the test they're giving now!"


Wedding Anniversary

A party was thrown in honour of a couple's 50th wedding
anniversary. The husband wanted to honour his wife, who
was hard of hearing. In the presence of all, he said,
"My dear wife, after fifty years I've found you tried
and true!"

Everyone clapped but his wife looked bothered. She
loudly asked, "WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

He spoke louder, "After fifty years of being married
I've found you tried and true!"

The upset wife shouted back, "And after fifty years of
marriage I'm tired of you, too!"

Words of Wisdom

If you could kick the person in the pants responsible
for most of your troubles, you wouldn't be able to sit
down for a month.
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