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Happun it's about linking time for ...
Started by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
puns and links (absurd I know) to have a thread of their very own.

Everyone is very welcome.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse






EDIT

FOR THE MESTER (Purple Paw);

8 April 2010




CLICK THE PIC






Here we go then:-

Why not jo anne sounds like a good eye deer

Perhaps you could explain how to produce links.

.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Hyperlinks

Copy and paste the http address of the page you want to link to:

http://www.wiganworld.co.uk/stuff/poetry.php?opt=poetry

Immediately before it type: [url=

Immediately after it type: ]

Give your link a title: Local Poetry

Then close with: [/url]

No spaces in between -
as for the Wigan Times example below your post as you type.

Local Poetry

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Sew that's how it's done.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse


It may seam tricky at first, but when you get the hang of it, it is not (hopefully).

Though I still make mistakes.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Cud it catch on?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Plenty do use hyperlinks on ww already, Dostaf.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Two words for your twenty two link jo anne.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
There was a rhyme so no reason for your tease on your last post, Dostaf.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Tease she says, tease

I wasn't the one speaking in riddles.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Here's a riddle:

Even though there's no snow - not deep or crisp or even in Wigan, there's still some on Wiganworld.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
A link about puns:

Many see puns as cheap humour, one-liners, or groaners ...

Others, like the writer Jonathan Swift, see them as a challenging art form :

'Punning is an art of harmonious jingling upon words which, passing in at the ears, excites a titillary motion in those parts;
and this, being conveyed by the animal spirits into the muscles of the face, raises the cockles of the heart.'

*A challenge to ww'ers to make a pun about links.*

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
But wheer d'you nick the pictures from?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I browse the web, using search engines like google, pick an image and then borrow the one I toes.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Duff first link jo anne.

Have some of mine.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Where did you pluck those from, Dostaf?

Many might raise one if you sported number 4.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Any road, Dostaf - how doh you call my link a duff.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Fairynuff missus. I'll call it a dud.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Titter ye not, Dostaf.

Haha! A dud indeed. Fear ye not - there's Moore where that came from.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Mono brow?

This star mon's features were a running joke here.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Sattire is not a major constellation, but can be a start

- such high profile people give trail blazing programme makers of our telly, scope to comment and entertain.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
On t'other hand, a sitar is a major consolation prize. Or even a minor one.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'm sat 'ere, wondering what to link and which way to pun.

I'm of a mind to make light work of it and make this my post, even if it's not that prized or sparkling, no cutting remarks, please.

(It might not be treasured, but hope you don't think it's dire mind you.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I wouldn't make cutting remarks to such as you jo anne.

Being a diamond geezer myself, I know a jewel when I see one.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Let us pledge to always polish our puns and links.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm sure there wood bee awarm welcome to all andsundry.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Hide be nervis if the bumble bee was angry, Dostaf.

It does appear to be, if not a swarm, friendly at least.

Hey all and Sundried are welcome every day.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Don't fret about the furry little ince sects jo anne, they're quite harmless and generally somewhat accommodating.


Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
My Hans are up! Knowing bees were quite harmless in summer made me feel quite happy. I love them as they go about their buzziness, but don't forget some are still wary and find them scary.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Toe nee Robinson's great on Time Teem.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Meteorology and M*A*P*

Archaeology and astronomy ... both unearth great findings from the black - adder bit of Basil and thyme, but sagely do not go bananas or there is a recipe for disaster.



Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Flipping eck jo anne, with all these maps and charts and desert islands, no wonder it all ended up herbal.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
For good elf, I recommend this herbal remedy, Dostaf.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Ah, the cup that cheers as samovar Russian friends say.

So here's a toast to your good health.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Cheers, Dostaf.

Butt brrr! Sunbathing magazines! Where are the trunks on the cover?
It's a nesbit chilly here - time to wrap up and keep snug, warm and cosy or you're Russian to catch a cold - you'd be bond to.


Then it will be Bless you or gesunderheit, Dostaf ... goes-a-good-height (10th Dec 22:26) is more apt.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I shawl rap-up well during the inclement weather.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I hope you don't think it rudolph me, Dostaf, but I shall present you with a more suitable woolly jumper.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Who stole me wrap. I don't wear fur actually.

I'll stick to me cardigans and jerseys. (aaaw)

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Sorry to be a pest, Dostaf - not stealing, just borrowing.

Wot no fur? Even at Christmas?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Now now,
I'm not all fur coat and no nickers.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'll be brief ... No one wants to cop an

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
A neye full missus?

My briefs will spare your blushes.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
You art cheeky but my face has not turned rouge, Dostaf.

I am frowning though ... Briefs?! Have you had a brush with the law?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
A brush with the law?
Me?

No way. I meant pants , not solicitors.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
All's well that ends well.

Glad it's only pants and you are law-abiding, Dostaf.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I always try to keep my nose clean jo anne. Honest.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Don't blow it.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Wot no post, Dostaf?!
We'll never make a ww record in time for Christmas.

So how about bands / song title puns *related to Christmas?

The wise MEN arena presents:
The Kings of Noel (they're starring tonight).

*There's three brothers and their cousin in the group.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Apple ogies for the tardy post jo anne.

Festive thinking caps on then.

Posted by: bennielechat (inactive) Report abuse
I'm so relieved you've turned up dostaf. I was asking jo anne if she'd seen you.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Bennie!

(He seems to be his usual self - being v cheeky over on the General Board.)

Posted by: bennielechat (inactive) Report abuse
Jo anne I thought I'd have a nosey in here and that's the er truth.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Thank you kind people.

A linkless post jo anne? Not like you.

Bennie, pull up a bracket and link away. But beware, jo anne's system can't see certain stuff. Was it webshots images jo anne?

Posted by: tonker (16991)   Report abuse
Aye, Happun!

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I think so, Dostaf.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I've been ferreting around for a link, Tonker.
Seth used a gun, as it happuns.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Was he a gamekeeper?

Posted by: tonker (16991)   Report abuse
He was a Very Nice Man!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
And a team player, no doubt.

Posted by: tonker (16991)   Report abuse
Here's another Link.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'm impressed with that well forged link, Tonker.

You're milking Seth's real name there, Dostaf.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Fools "rush" in where angelis fear to tread. (Or three tread in this case.)

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Tanks, Dostaf.

Will Young ones sing :

I Wish It Christmas Eve Right Now.

***
Pun Link

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Christmas may be coming but sadly it's not only the goose that's getting fat.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Is it time for Christmas trimmings?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Yes indeed jo anne

My yuletide six pack has more of a resemblance to this and this.

Perhaps one less of these on the 25th will help.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Or playing this game to pass the time, instead of indulging in Christmas treats and delights?

(My cheeky children like that game.)

Posted by: franny (4612)   Report abuse
Christmas Song

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Men behaving gladly, Franny!

Posted by: franny (4612)   Report abuse
I got the full collection as a birthday pressie Jo anne and that clip always tickles me. Its where Tony starts singing in a low voice and moving his head. Cracks me up everytime!

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Men Behaving Badly was v funny. Franny.

Has everyone seen Brian's news?

"Next year will see wiganworld go from strength to strength.

Another new version is under way - no more blue links. There won't be red links either. You'll have to wait and see. ;) "

It's hard enough waiting for Christmas!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I hope fiddling with blue links is a wise move.

Googling images for "blue" was interesting.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'll leave it to the experts, Dostaf.

(A blue violin can help with testing websites.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Yehudi better leave it to them jo anne.

If you think theres any tampering aloft tonight, it's probably only this clever feller.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
(There will be others out on the tiles in Wigan tonight, Dostaf.)

... Listen carefully and you may hear a jingle of bells.

It is fair-if we leave a mince pie and glass of sherry for the magic man.

And rudolph us to forget a carrot.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I trust you had a joyful noel. With a good feed and all that jazz.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
It was awreet, thanks, Dostaf.
I hope you enjoyed the day.

No turkey, just a Yorkshire pudding (they're easymeat!) and vegetables , but we were still full to bursting - luckily no truss required - we are careful with our colons, etc. full stop.

My youngest sent an email:

im so happy I could burst

Happily she didn't.

No jazz, but the children singing Busted with mic and PS2 Singstar.

Posted by: bennielechat (inactive) Report abuse

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'll do a signing if you will jo anne.

All proceeds going to the home for bewildered cliffy fans.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I don't know if I have the bottle, Dostaf.

Oh, go on, happen I do.

ps sciurus post a cracker.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
We could go dutch in the bottle dept.

Meanwhile, here's a party hat to go with that festive cracker.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse

But the best-laid plans of mice and men often go astray
Add the best-made puns of *mine and many often go away ... (*not Dostaf's).

Even if I had the bottle, I'm not sure I have the write stuff ... no one will want a copy to behold and signed ...

Oh, Auld Lang Syne!

So rather than going into publishing, let's make it a happy new beer going into pub listings instead.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Well my first impression jo anne, was
enough of the crusty old Scottish lingo

But you can bet ALS will get well- mumbled and mangled as always, this week.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Mumbling is not cool nor is mangeling.

"It is concluded that Burns probably only added a few verses of the song. The most compelling evidence is demonstrated in a letter from Burns to Mrs Agnes Dunlop in which he comments..

'Light be the turf on breast of the heaven-inspired poet who composed this glorious fragment! There is more of the fire of native genius in it than in half a dozen of modern English Bacchanalians' "

(They don't write letters like they used to.)

Singing ALS and linking is a tradition that will never be tired of - I hope.

I am making a pre-New Year's Resolution to learn the words to Auld Lang Syne.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Good evening to all on what will be the last night of 2008

Ears wishing an appy
New Year to all.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I second that.

Have a great chime everyone.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
It'll soon be time for twelve bongs and it's next year.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Have a smashing 2009.
Take care everybody x

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I think you can bank on me recycling more bottles this year.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I try to be green.

We've wheelie bin spoiled in Wigan.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
So spoiled that it was reported in Burnley.

I bet they were green with envy.

By the way, that "Green Lady" print , seen in thousands of homes in the Seventies, was allegedly cursed. This came into the popular press after seemingly many houses that had been on fire contained one. Spooky.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Spooky indeed. I don't think there will be many hanging about in Wigan homes these days though

Any road, this green person helps to keep people safe.

Re: cycling - there are plenty of these nowadays in the Wigan borough.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
That picture would grace anyone's chimney breast jo anne. Is it the original?

Speaking of green men, I don't think yu see many of these hereabouts.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
(Dostaf - I can't find anything about the curse of the Green Lady print, but have found that of the Crying boy?


I hope he wasn't crying as Charley said, 'Don't have fun'.)

PS Wat-er grate punster Yu are.

PPS Have green men been visiting Wigan recently?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Oh dear it seems I may have got the wrong print.

As for the visitors, they've been here before.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
It's no use crying over print mix-ups, Dostaf.

So Bernard Wrigley thinks Martians would be at home in Wigan?!
Possibly in Mars Green.

The creator of the 70's hit sitcom “The Fall And Rise or Reginald Perrin” is coming to Wigan as part of the Words ‘09 Literature Festival.

David Nobbs will take part in a question and answer session as part of next April’s three week programme of events.

*Words ‘09 will be the sixth Leigh and Wigan Literary Festival to be held in the borough.

(*5th post down - For Word Thank You .)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
That's news to me jo anne.

I've always been a reggie fan.

Although I preferred Rigsby.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
This chap'll be all write by you then, Dostaf.


I'd have never watched either series if it wasn't for repeats - that would be amiss.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
By gum jo anne, that Rigsby link had me hooked last night. I really got stuck into it. But when I posted this here I couldn't find this;

"Alan has his overcoat draped around his shoulders. Rigsby picks up an empty sleeve. (Stand Up And Be Counted).
- Oohh, been biting your nails again?
"



Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I thought the Rigsby link would be up ure street.

Now you have more Rigsbyisms up your sleeve and tickling your funny bone.

- "Oohh, been biting your nails again?"
That Rigsby was gnaw-ty!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Of course it was right up my street.

But if you'll kindly bear with me once more.

It was never said where the programme was set (see setting).

Though I'm sure Rigsby once mentioned the River Humber.

But after my Green Lady info.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
So all the leads seem to point to Leeds?
Or is it best not to jump to conclusions?

Of course, not meaning to be bigheaded, but I must immodestly say:

"I nevur get anything wrong."

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
And modest with it.

I've struggled to find an image of a chapel modesty board.
That's a modesty panel. Seen a lot of corsets though.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Of cors-et's inevitable you'd find the cheeky links, Dostaf.

I am the original Ms Modesty - see God's standard which seems to be at odds with **Gok's standard.

**I'll modestly point out how I've kindly spared you the trouble of googling 'How to Look Good Naked'.

So I've spared you the sights of people without attire,
or
the sites of people with spare air tyres.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Like this mon jo anne.

PS here's a bare leg image.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
More lower limb links to follow:

A shapely pair of long bared legs, Dostaf.

And four bare legs - I hope they didn't give anyone paws for alarm.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Steady on jo anne. A long legged bird like that should be protected.

Being cheeky, is that bear off to the usual place?

If so, I hope he has the appropriate paperwork.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
If so, I hope he has the appropriate paperwork.

That photo on the Toilet Guide is Charmin' - a Royle sitting on his throne to spend a penny!

I'd be deterred from using Encams Guide - the public conveniences seem a little too public.

Glad you found the modesty panel - it wood be useful to hide a bear behind.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm still not able to find if the Victorians really did hide their furniture legs.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I've done a little research, not undercover and no leg work required (phew!), and I can now *proudly present to you:

Victorian Legs.

It appears you might sea (if you looked carefully) a piano laden with cloth in many middle klass homes.

*My modesty apparent then again.

Butt, pride comes before a fall ...
And I do not wish to break a leg at this stage.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Brilliant.

Well-done you. I wonder why owd Diamante drawers never replaced these with one of these on top of his * old joanna.

* Apologies for using your namesake. I know there's a big difference.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
This is a grand video - if a lady had posed atop of Liberace's pianos, (he was a man of many grands), her slide would come before a fall.

Hey - he noticed the difference in spelling!

According to wikipedia, a bigkey difference in the two names is:
Joanna is a feminine given name, whereas Joanne is a 'common' given name for females.

'Common' indeed.

How pride does come before a fall.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Nowt wrong with common jo anne. Ask lot.

At least you're in good company.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
My dad chose my name as he thought it *novel.

There were four Joannes in my primary school classes and four in my secondary school forms.

(*After that there were pages of Joannes in the birth registry.)

I'd be a punter and bet on there not being many Dostafs at your schools - quite a rarity.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Yes indeed jo anne. You'd have as much chance of platting fog than finding another dostaf at my alma mater.

If you are a punting type you can have a safe bet on that. You could be a lucky punter.

PS It's really a nom de plume. Or should that be board?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Oh write, so Dostaf is your Nom de plume!

Like the author (and Arthur) whose real surname I won't blurt out?

Might I ask - how do you pronounce Dostaf?

I always say Doh - staff to any likely looking chaps in Wigan who could be you.

Well there's miles of fog in the Wigan hair tonight - so I shall go and plait it - a likely tail and a trying misttake.

(Edit- Sorry, I'd used a word with a second meaning I wasn't aware of. I've just checked - too late was the cry.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
What've I missed?

Was it a mispronunciation joanne?

Actally I dont pronounce it myself. I just type it.

If you see these chaps in Wigan, it's not me. I'm a little taller.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
What've you mist? Not much, Dostaf.
(A mispronunciation is (2.)barkering up the wrong tree.)

I didn't have the foggiest about a word's second meaning, but it soon became clear I should edit when I looked it up.

Are you stilted or dosty'af long legs?

**"Actally I dont pronounce it myself. I just type it."

**You must pronounce it in your head though - even if you don't say it outloud - many puns don't work otherwise!

Haha! I'd've missed the actally pun if it wasn't for copying it to quote here!
Please would you annotate your puns from now on - I believe that would be most helpful.


And before you can say, 'Wot no links?' with worry or hope (I worry it's not the former and hope it's not the latter) ...

Better late than never!

and (2.)

PS Such height might come before a fall. Take care.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
sorry jo anne, the act tally reference was a
plain and simple typo.

When I used spellcheck the other evening, I dropped a right clanger.

When the check was complete, I clicked on the "Click here to go back" note. Losing a string of links.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
How frustrating!
This linking business can be laborious and make me crabby.

I now write involved posts on an email and then copy it, paste and post. If you click to go back, you still have the copy.

Such a sweet Clanger! Who would have thought they used bad language?

So actally was a Freudian quip.
Just a typo. Such modesty.
(Type O's are very common.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
O men(and women) are common, when it comes to blood jo anne.

Apparently, it's a popular group.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Who can beat The Beatles?!

Others can only ever be in their shadow. (For Bennie )

They definitely all had something about them.

One had a knack of seeing the pitfalls of life (amongst other things).

For another the sky's the limit too.

One who brought such calmer karma.

A Fab Four with a lot to tank for.

(I'm trying to drum up recognition where it is due.)



Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Aye jo anne, the Fab Four were certainly iconic

They didn't produce rubbish.

That Macca and his mucker certainly knew their onions.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Two legs good, four legs better - wheelie!

(I can say it with authority!)

Four lads are better than many other bands too.

But I won't fight about it.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Take care jo anne.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Best wishes.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I've decided to bounce back.

Oh dam and blast you might say.

Please excuse my French but may we parry again?

So you pooh-pooh The Beatles

What/who in the music world attracts your ear and merits your praise?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm glad you chose to spring back.

Now you have returned we shall parry on.

Musically speaking, my tastes are varied.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Haha! You like liquorice.

But "*Musically speaking, my tastes are varied."

Yes, you have * sung of which sweets you like to eat, but I fair can't weigh up why you said Sweet Fanny Adams about music.

(Wat-erbout
this sweet, btw?)

Please name your tunes - Tout de suite!!

You don't get away with 'allsorts' that easily!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Actally I'm easy going. But I dont' like rap music, or heavy rock.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I love music and would be able to find something I like in all *genres.

*That sounds good too - I'm not really an expert though.

I love CD's, youtube and the radio, but yesterday (all my troubles seemed so far away) until I heard something on the radio that made me almost go Ga Ga.

I settled down at my pc (with a cup of tea) and googled :

"While millions of people tap into RGoogle without considering the environment, a typical search generates about 7g of CO2.

Boiling a kettle generates about 15g."

So it's cowd water cuppas and a lessened likelihood of linking for this ww'er.

*****

Links - Where I would have linked, but now I shall just give clues.

R - Recycled Links (This one was used previously on 17th January, General Messageboard, Going Out Tonight thread.)


Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
CO2 you reckon jo anne? As in greenhouse gas?

I can recycle puns but not links.

To even the ballance I'll start removing bulbs from fridges.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Dostaf - you could have boiled four kettles with your last post - a WW tea party.

Well, I won't be aparty to such frivolitea.

Although ... there has been a new wave of animated smilies who reside and respire on ww ...

Sorry to be brew-tal - a link I waste not --> wave not.

Less WW CO2 if this link will C2U, wanton waver!

[I could breathe a sigh of relief if it does - an exhalent result! (Except .. oh no .. CO2.) I must teastrain-er myself - some ww'ers think is a blast!]

Edit: Serves me right - I should have sean it in my tea leaves. This smilie's wave won't break even for tea.
Brian's proposed Tonker Mode would make a refreshing alternative.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I don't know about kettles jo anne, but those flaming wavy smileys are like a plague of boils.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Boils - sorely irritating and unsightly ... pusibly unsitely for some ww'ers.

Dostaf - RLanced boils don't matter ... we can safely pustulate it's in The Lanc-it - how green of us.

'Tonker Mode' will hairdress the problem coifferly - separating (but not *suppurating - ughh) wavy-haves and wavy-have-nots. Some hair might not curless ... I'm on a roller now ... but I'd still suppose 'WW Tonker Mode' shears are worth having a cut in.

(Out of site is out of mind - so each peace is worth quiet a byt.)

Sorry to be so sharp - I like you still.
(I don't mean to hurt - that isn't my style.)
****

*suppurate - vi. fester, form pus

I've started checking in my trusty (not crusty) old dictionary rather than boldy Googling where no ww'er may have started trekking before. There is ample space for us all to help our environment and wave goodbye to wanton waste (and waves).

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Your endeavours to save the planet are indeed admirable jo anne.

but at what point would you stop?

Rodent powered meeces perhaps?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
But what when the hamster's energy is sapped - it will paws for a rest, Dostaf.

And, even if it works, you've got to admit (not omit) that rodents emit CO2 too - so we're going round in circles. Oh cursors!

I've been puzzling over this

and now am nurserying a budding idea to redress the balance.

How about LD branching out and developing an ever green plant to convert our links' CO2 to O2 - its whereabouts being a closely-gardened secret and difficult to root out.

Photosynthesis - food for thought, not just for trees.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Careful jo anne. Laboratoires Dostaf have a good reputation.

I shouldn't like to be accused of talking hydroponics

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Dostaf - LD's good reputation will only grow if my idea is nurtured and problems carefully weeded out as they arise.

'Hydroponics is also a standard technique in biology research and teaching' - it's not a dirty word or tactic.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Have you been listening to these lads jo anne.

There was a rumour going around that they are partial to a little weed now and again. But I'll leaf you to draw your own conclusions.


Seriously though, I suppose that from little acorns you could get some trees.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Well I'd seek to nip such a rumour in the bud.

I find being green can be quite a bonce warch.

But I will try to watch how I tread in wiganworld threads.

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse
Am just trying summat..... just ignore me

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse
He he i like that

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
We wouldn't ignore you Tracy - you're very welcome here.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Yes, feel free to join in tracy. We don't stand on ceremony and nof funny handshakes are required.

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse
thank you both Jo anne and dostaf

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
You are very welcome Tracy - I'll wave back .

(It would be rude not too Dostaf.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm happy to give tracy a wave or even waves back.

But I suspect a cunning plan by jo anne to trap me into joining the Booger Boogie.

Unfortunately, on principle I'm sticking to my guns.


Although I must admit I've been wondering if a link to a booger would count as surrender.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
That Rlink was to a booger boom, but you only acted as the middle-man so, no, it doesn't count.

My resolve won't flag Dostaf and I won't let Rthis rest.

No * * * * * * * *, so Rsurrender.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
High up! I see you've met me half-wave, Dostaf.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Thwaaarted.

Tea break quickie;

I was so impressed by your semaphore link jo anne that I felt the least I could do was to give you a wave (also as a courtesy to tracy). Forgetting that some folk are looking at larger screens than me, I didn't think my practice wave would show up.

I had intended explaining this later.TTFN

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse

Posted by: trixie (4490)   Report abuse
i asked about doin that.tell me step by step.please

i like it

Posted by: trixie (4490)   Report abuse

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
No problem trixie.

The one I used (God forgive me) was taken from a free site and put into my photobucket account. More of that later if needed.

That account gives an address for the image, much the same as every other link on here.

For the time being (and for practice) right click on one of my wavey men and you'll get a box on screeen with a menu on it. left click on properties and you'll see info about the image.

In this case the address is

http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f254/botoph/smiley-faces-80.gif

Are you OK with copy and paste to get the address on your screen?

To make that into an image you have to do the old bracket trick. Similar to the colour changes on your text, but a little more tricky. (Just a little, be patient)


I'll leave it there for the time being to see if you are OK so far.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I don't use photobucket Dostaf.

My method:

A free site: bestsmileys.com

From the waving category I've chosen , but Dostaf's is there too.

Copy & paste the text : [img]http://bestsmileys.com/waving/1.gif[/img]

Then alter it by 'changing' the : [img] to [img=
and
insert ] at the asterisk: gif*[/img] so it's gif][/img]

If that makes sense.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Better advice there from jo anne.

Easier to get an image address for your image ie. http://bestsmileys.com/waving/1.gif from.

PS jo anne, I hope you realise that my posting of a wavey is the on-line equivalent of something like this.

Shakespeare Display.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Hello trixie.

Posted by: trixie (4490)   Report abuse
hello dostaf

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm trying to seee the link that didn't work. Hang on.

Or print the address on here and we'll sort it.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
="http://plugin.smileycentral.com/http%253A%252F%252Fwww.smileycentral.com%252F%253Fpartner%253DZSzeb008%255FZUman000%2526i%253D36%252F36%255F33%255F7%2526feat%253Dprof/page.html" target="_blank"><img src="http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_33_7.gif" alt="SmileyCentral.com" border="0"><img border="0" src="http://plugin.smileycentral.com/http%253A%252F%252Fimgfarm%252Ecom%252Fimages%252Fnocache%252Ftr%252Ffw%252Fsmiley%252Fsocial%252Egif%253Fi%253D36%252F36_33_7%2526uiv%253D3.0/image.gif"></



SmileyCentral.com

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
So from that lot


SmileyCentral.com

Posted by: trixie (4490)   Report abuse
its smiley central supposed to be a parrot on a perch dont know the address..

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Hang on a mo.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
[img]http://bestsmileys.com/pirate/2.gif[/img]

That, came from bestsmileys and needs adapting.

From here.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
(img=http://bestsmileys.com/pirate/2.gif][/img]


I've used a curved bracket at the begining to illustrate. Square ones create the link.


Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
"Hang on a mo."

Un happolly it's a long mo.

That smiley central link is too tricky for me.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
The same address line with a square bracket at the start made the image.

ie [img=http://

I know it's not a parrot. I haven't downloaded smiley central.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
The cavalry's here.

Posted by: trixie (4490)   Report abuse
they seem like the ones i've got it transfering them to here thats the prob ,will have get some tuition,thanks

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Can you copy and paste the address of the image trixie?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Sorry Trixie - I can't help - but I think some ww'ers do post smiley central images on the messageboards.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Or try practising with bestsmiley stuff.

Posted by: trixie (4490)   Report abuse
i get all that bumf when i copy+paste,thanks for your help anyway.will try practising

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Anyway Dostaf - "my posting of a wavey is the on-line equivalent of something like this." (Shakespeare Display)

I know where we would see the biggest rumpus in reality.

And I am not following suit.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
You're welcome trixie.

Feel free to have a go on here with some of the images. As I said earlier. The thing being, if we can see where the bumf starts, we can hopefully see what's amiss.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Where else would you have me present my attributes jo anne?

The Market Square has gone.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Yes, but I can still picture it.

Why not go and look at the new heritage sculptures near Trencherfield Mill - there's a bargee and mill worker there, but I don't think they've had much media exposure as yet.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Are you daring me to wave into hyperspace missus?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
SmileyCentral.com

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
How did you do it - I nearly fell off my perch when I saw it.

Just found the answer on the 'Est ever bin clemmed' thread.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Look at the clemmed thread. I just tried one section begining with http.and copied that.

(img=http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_33_7.gif" alt="SmileyCentral.com" border="0"><img border="0" src="http://plugin.smileycentral.com/http%253A%252F%252Fimgfarm%252Ecom%252Fimages%252Fnocache%252Ftr%252Ffw%252Fsmiley%252Fsocial%252Egif%253Fi%253D36%252F36_33_7%2526uiv%253D3.0/image.gif][/img]

I'm so happy I could wave.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
"Qui audet adipiscitur."

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Who said what on telly?

Go on translate please.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Latin: "Who dares wins."

(Wikipedia said so.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
No wonder I was struggling.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Please excuse my French.

This should make you sit up: asseoir

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I was taught that a Frenchman's auntie has lovely handwriting.

Or was that a Dutch uncle?

I forget. Blame the parrot.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
You've lost me there too Dostaf.

(I wouldn't blame the parrot though - he seems to have been through enough today.)

That peacock feathers he's quite a show off - he proudly displays his attributes.

(I do feel guilty searching for links these days, so like a pea-hen, I am quite dull.)

PS I won't be ww'ing for a while - keep up the good www ww work!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Auntie's plume-age. Heard on the old magnetaphone jo anne.

Take care.

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse
Lol.... i cant believe it actually worked

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Eureka

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse
Have you clicked on the "testing do not disturb" picture Dostaf

im feelin reet clever now

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Not half as clever as I'm feeling kid.

I was going to ask how you did it, but decided to try sticking an image in a link, instead of a title.

And it worked. Wheyhey.


D

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse
You clever little sod

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
(Hello - I'm back again.)

I missed your hidden 'Testing Do Not Disturb' link at first, Tracy.

So I was deter-mined not to take Dostaf's post just on face-value. I'm pit-browed of you both, clever clogs (like me).

How's abar-t this then Dostaf?

Code it be you read my post without seeing a Tracy of a link?

(14th Nov 16:32)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I think I missed it jo anne.

Hey, you don't think WW tracy, and Sainsbury's "Sarah 42" are connected do you?

Have you been baking recently tracy?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Aren't there spy wares to protect internet connections?

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse
DOH!!! i thought id beat Jo ann at summat

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Sorry Tracy - I don't mean to be a big-head.

I'm not an egg head - really, I'm not. (I wouldn't want you to beat that.)

Tracy and Dostaf - have you seen the Vertical Face sculpture in Wigan yet?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I have cast my eye over the head jo anne. I must say I'm impressed by the way each section has been individually shaped before welding.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I love that aspect of The Face, Dostaf - it would be great to see Rick Kirby at work.

I also love seeing other faces of Wigan when people first come face-to-face with the sculpture. I have seen expressions of sheer delight and sheer horror too.

And where for art you, the Wiend Children's Library?
I have read it's wending its way to The Galleries - how things shop and change in our town centre.

(Even The Face will have to head off elsewhere one day.)

Posted by: tracyh30 (6850)  Report abuse
I think that the face is scary

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Then cover your eyes tracy.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Great photo Dostaf - more starey than scary from that view.

Don't worry Tracy - the Face is moving, but where to and when remains to be seen - we'd best keep our eyes open.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I think that peeping Tom was at Lincoln drill Hall.

There are some interesting comments at the foot of this article.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Was that the Tony Robinson, do you think?!

All artists must face criticism as well as (hopefully) praise.
I love The Face of Wigan, but my Mum is appalled by it.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Without sounding like Les Dawson's pervy character, I wouldn't mind a closer look at Kirby's metal missus.

You get some idea of the work that must have gone into it by looking at the eyelids and nostrils on the Lincloln face.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I agree - that's beautiful Dostaf.

That magazine article - '10 subliminal tricks that make people adore you' is scary - like Derren Brown's mind tricks.

I wonder if that copy of Cosmo is still available.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Ooooh err missus.

I hadn't noticed the featured items.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Worry you not, Dostaf.

I only noticed that one and it must have captured my imagination...

(I once saw Derren show how **strategically-placed vocabulary in a piece of written work could have subliminal e/affects on readers.)

I wonder if that could work in a post to stop the WW boom of boogie-ing boogers.

[PS Picture a heap for sheep in black & white.]

[PPS More WORDS I've herd.]

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
We need some sort of Pied Piper to rid the plce of boogers jo anne.

I see Reggie's writer is to visit Wigan. Can you see the WW webcam on the last one?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
We've had WORDS about Reggie's writer before Dostaf - 4th Jan - the post with Nobbs on.

Here's some pied pipers Dostaf - I wonder if they reely would help on Wiganworld?

(Note to self: the subliminal message didn't work - must e-mail this chap for a more derrin plan.)

Why did you pose the question about the whereabouts of the WW webcam, Dostaf? Just a casual moontion in passing?

(Agh - I've just seen some photo's on my last google ... please stick to the virtual WW equivalent.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Do you think D Brown could plant some seeds in a few WW minds to rid us of boogers jo anne.


I wouldn't be averse to that as a solution.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
How about a ww version of Raversion therapy that will come as a Rshock to you and is sure to cause a furrow to many a ww'er's brow ...

Post a Rb****r and a timberable fate will befell you - it involves logging so, oakfully, LD's ever green Rplant is growing well.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Are you quite sure about all this recycling jo anne?

Anyone would think you were with auntie.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Are you *tellying me off Dostaf?

Just joking - I liked the *pun, in fact I'll telly you I think it's good enough to repeat.
I know there is a remote risk of you switching over to another messageboard now...

I am trying to Google less, and with more care, but whether my efforts will help remains R2B-Ceen.

If I had to be Google-less altogether, well I'd have to resort to drastic measures and use another search engine. It would drive me crazy otherwise.

Re. recycling - sometimes I do feel like saying, R'On yer bike!' to it all. It can be tyresome.
(But please don't repeat that to anyone else.)

And re. Carol Thatcher - I won't link, but please think of the thread on 'General' (this may require using more brain power, mind you) ...
I really like that lady!
Boo to the RBeeb or at least the blabber who thought Carol had bloobed and said something to be bleeped out!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I agree with your fanfare for the BBC jo ane. I also like Carol.

I hope the lady meant no harm. but we don't have all the facts.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
('we don't have all the facts', but some would still call her naughty.)

It would be good to have all the facts - all this over-PC nonsense is giving me bonce warch.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
PC Nonsense (in black and white)

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
They are definitely being taken for a ride.

From not behaving PC to PC not behaving.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Mr Thompson's people certainly seem to have double standards.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
PC gone mad Angers me, but I don't do anything about it, so what can I say?

This Blair clearly saw it coming, but how do we see it off?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I fear political correctness can, and is used as a tool for bullies.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
That is a fair insight into how political correctness is used and sometimes people are just blinking daft.

It needs *reining in before more good people come a cropper.

*Recycled pun

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'll drink to that.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
What a Rovering eye you have Dostaf.

First Tracy and now Hayley ... you are a bit of a Soap's anorak really, aren't you?

Go on, come clean!

(You won't be barred from WW.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Rover?? Anorak??

Could you possibly be referring to this mon?

Is anoraknophobia a fear of trainspotters?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Well played Dostaf.

A hot dog - I hope it never rolls over on The Street as there's plenty of nosy parkas who dish the dirt there.

Is anoraknophobia a fear of trainspotters?

Norris far as I know, but you might be on the right track, Dostaf.

'Anorak?-no!-phobia' may be a fear of rain-spotters though.
I thought that pun, 'brolly?-good!'.

Eeeh, in't it great how many times you can stick your tongue out at others on ww!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Any anorak wearers who visit the street looking for a tram on the viaduct will feel let down.

The image in the opening sequence is done by magic and trickery.

And not just cobbled together either.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
There are plenty of lines on The Street that transport viewers to Soapland though, Dostaf.

And it's Rcobbles that soap 'addicts' all wear anoraks, but possibly some do when they're catching the omnibus.

(Don't some characters have a Rbumpy ride in Soap storylines?)

So ... *which is your favourite soap?

I think I can name the barmaid of soap you'd like to hug, but *you're not allowed to answer with the name of a bar made of soap.

No flannel!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm not really an avid soap-opera fan jo anne. Most of it is like moving wallpaper but some stuff gets absorbed.

If pressed I'd have to opt for Corrie as a favourite, simply as it's set in our part of the world.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I like Coronation Street best of all - there's no real competition.

This is Auntie's favourite.

And don't forget the Neighbours.

I didn't see Moving Wallpaper, but I like Jason R.
(Great Scott - I have even read a little of his autobiography, but I think it'd be much better chatting to him instead.)

I loved watching The Sullivans when I was in primary school and then Neighbours - we went home for dinners, which is quite rare for children nowadays.

I don't watch much television any more - but my eyes are still quite squarish.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I don't really care for foreign soaps jo anne.

Ye gods, the Sullivans. That's a blast from the past Just how long were that family at war.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
[The Sullivans aired (in Australia): November 1976–March 1983 - but in the later storylines the war was over.]

It seems one of your perennial TV favourites is *********.

I haven't ever read the Past Forward magazine - I spend too much time here. T T F N

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


touche jo anne.

I have often wondered how long the swinging sixties lasted up there.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
'The nostalgic drama set in North Yorkshire has been an ITV Sunday night staple since it first aired in 1992.'

A decade is rhea-lly, writely stretching longer than it really, rightly did.

(I hope Heartbeat isn't *decadent - I haven't watched it for years and years (and years) but know Greengrass is(was?) a card and codologist, and not a cardiologist.)

'ITV suspends Heartbeat production'.

But it will still be bouncing back onto our screens ...
'Be still, Dostaf's beating heart'.

*****
*dec'adent a. deteriorating; morally corrupt

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
PS Dostaf - (I never miss a beat).

As a regular contributor to ww you have made 6030 posts to date.

This post is my no. 3863.
(And as Safety is my middle name, I always mind the gap.)

Please would you be kind enough toi let me catchup a little?
Thank you in advance.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
And

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'm

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
boldly

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
not

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
taking, "NO!" for an answer!

(3868 now!)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Worse than counting calories. And you can gladly have some of mine. Post counts and calories..

PS The post count is partly due to some rapid-fire banter thet sometimes goes on and the fact that this is the only place where I do post.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
It was one of my children who noticed the difference - I don't count posts (or calories) really, Dostaf.

you can gladly have some. Post counts

Thanks you, that is more than kind.

I'm not greedy ... how about 2,500 (a nice round figure.)

Of course, it's quality, not quantity, that matters - happily we can count on you for both in ww.

(Sorry, as before, I don't mean to make you .)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I hadnt heard of Mr Button jo anne.

Interesting concept.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I hadn't heard of Benjamin Button until I saw the film being reviewed recently.
It is a lengthy adaptation of F. Scott Fitzgerald's story - a tall order which the reviewers felt fell short of hopeful expectations (even though Brad Pitt's in it.)

The name Benjamin Button is sew wonderful.
(Indeed, perfectly preferable to Deed Poll - I hope it isn't too late to recommend it to you.)

I liked the short story and think it's entertaining, informative and thought-provoking.

Here's another *short story you may also enjoy.

(*Sorry - that's a tol-story.)

*****

LOST.



Has anyone seen this cat?
He's managed to lose himself on the General Messageboard.

(18:56 Friday 13th)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Not lost jo anne.

Just doing a bit of light reading.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
That's a piece of good news.

Wiganworld needs you!

It's 17:18, Friday, People arguing like mad.....

There's been so much flak here recently, Xrh has even invested (and vegs) in a helmet...

With your timely (long timely) studying, you can bring peace in our town.


So fear we not in Wiganworld!
All is not lost as neither is Dostaf!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Flippin heck jo anne, that was a weighty tome. No need for nit-oil there.

Personally, I'm more of a Wharf and Peas man myself.

PS Note the theme of the pinball machine which came up randomly. I can't tell if Paulie Wallnuts' face is on there.(Though he may be in the top left corner)

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I think he is in the top-left, Dostaf. I didn't know who Paulie was so I missed Xrh's joke yesterday.

Were you burning the midnight oil (and the early hours oil too) to read War and Peace or did you decide not to battle your way through it?

I'll need some Nytol tonight. There's a good treason, too. My naughty quip on the Chip Pon thread - I did edit, but was it in time?

I will be worrying my head about it, and about my head.
I worry there are no nits about my head, too. Might I still use nit-oil with my usual shampoo to make my hair unsqueaky clean?

I'll rest a little easier if it does. .

Recently, near the Pier, I felt like Victoria Meldrew (but not quite so old, mind you.)

A WLCT spokesperson said: "Police have stepped up patrols in the area of the thefts and are continuing to offer their support and help.

"However, everybody has a responsibility to stop vandalism and make Wigan a nicer borough to live in.

"This is a community project and as such everybody has a vested interest in ensuring these statues remain a source of pride for the benefit of people across the borough."


Accordingly, I have stepped up my patrols on foot, with my dog on paw, along the canal. But can you bank on us to step in if we see anything untoward happening to the heritage sculptures?



Out on 'a patrol' we came across three chaps, who came across as well-dressed, decent, congenial middle-aged gentlemen, enjoying a stroll along the canal path, possibly in their dinner hour. They were near the mill-worker and exuberantly talking about her; as my dog and I drew closer we heard their banter. Such words as *c*ap were uttered ... (*the unasterisked version is in my official report). It was too late to cover my two year old dog's ears, or protect the mill-worker from such mockery.
One of the 'gentle'men went further and firmly grasped the mill-worker by her head and knee and rocked her to show how light-weight and ill-secured she was on her seat.

And your vandalism vigilantes? We six-legged it away, briskly.

What an absurd farce the whole heritage sculptures' episode has become - I don't believe it!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I haven't seen the statues myself jo anne, but from what I can gather, they don't seem to be strongly made or securely placed.

"One of the 'gentle'men went further and firmly grasped the mill-worker by her head and knee and rocked her to show how light-weight and ill-secured she was on her seat."

I'm afraid I would probably have given a rather curmudgeonly appraisal of the situation myself.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
You'd have got up to your neck in it then, Dostaf?

As I approached them, I did plan to engage in their cheery banter and ask the chap to leave the mill-worker alone, but I wasn't brave enough.

(My dog is an even bigger scaredy-cat than me.)

But that I even considered it shows my daft banter with strange men on ww is helping me gain in confidence.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Afterthought:
(Actually, it might have been better if I'd have put 'men who are strangers on ww'...
no, I think I was right the first time.)


Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


I meant I would have agreed (probably) with the description.
I talk to anyone me.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I talk to anyone me.
That I don't doubt, Dostaf.

I'm not quite as quiet as this or this - I will smile and say, 'hello,' to most people when out dog-walking - but it's write to say I am more type-ative than talkative.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
One thing I can't get my head around jo anne, is those folk you smile, nod, or speak to, who then either ignore or look straight through you.

As they say. It costs nowt.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Lots of reasons, Dostaf.

Fear, low self-esteem/confidence, shyness, not having heard, illness, preoccupation with a serious life event ...
or something more entertaining.

No response might not actually be a deliberate negative response.

I try to have the attitude that it costs nowt and it's a bonus if someone is friendly back.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm mindful of those various reasons you cite jo anne. I'm careful what I say and who I say it to, as I wouldn't like to impose. Hopefully I manage to gauge it right. Obviously I wouldn't attempt to engage in conversation with someone who appeared somewhat shy.


I know it's hard to really judge the situation and one can never really tell. I just try to be pleasant and polite with the bleedin beggarin so-an-sos.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse


Have some of mine, Dostaf - I think I've got too much at times.

Possibly because there are times when I've been the bleedin beggarin so-an-so.


and the world smiles with you, or is more likely to.

Pollyanna Syndrome

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


I wouldn't ever be described as someone who "doesn't suffer fools gladly" either jo anne.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I gladly suffer these fools, but I don't understand what you mean?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
The folk who are said not to "suffer fools gladly" dont seem to have much time for strange folk. ie Oddballs and the like.

I seem to attract them.

What starts with a casual comment, leaves me wondering if I've got a light above me that they flock to.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Mind you, they probably think the same about me.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse


If they flock to you, they probably do.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Well, they do say it takes one to know one.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I will make no comment.




Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage. - Maxims

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse



Remember this mon?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'm not quite old enough, Dostaf.
If only I was a little older (and wiser) - well, wiser at least.

Sage the Owl – An irate owl who was almost always in a bad mood. He also fell out of his nest a lot, and hated getting his feathers wet. He couldn't sing if his life depended on it, and was roped into helping to hatch Tarragon's egg. His song was "I'm a rather fat feathery owl called Sage / I'm not happy now in fact in a rage!"

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Another clever dickie bird for you then.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
(Another Dickie Bird for you - I know this sport doesn't bowl you over.)

Wooden woodpecker book-end Professor Yaffle.

I remember him well, but I couldn't remember his name.
What a fine name!
(Did a little dickie bird tell me? There is no link to one this time.)



Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Harold is actually well known for displaying certain stereotypical Yorkshire traits jo anne.

Allegedly

Deep pockets and short arms seems to be fashionable over there.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
*WARNING - Post contains mildly horrific allusions*

Whereas some Wigan men are quite generous with their underhand compliments about their neighbours.

Don't you think you should give it a rest.

I know you think Yorkshire is a corking place really.

This naughty streak in jest may one day falsely attest that you don't.

Yorkshire might bowl maiden overs and it will be you who helped them get a head.

There could be a new Wigan myth for the 21st century.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Are you saying I'm some sort of secret admirer of Tykeland jo anne?

How cutting of you.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Not cutting, Dostaf, though I am sharp enough to see the object of your ♥♥l'amour♥♥, no matter how you might object.

There are clues (22nd Aug 2008 at 14:48) along the way.

(Watch you don't have your chips with a red herring.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
"I am sharp enough to see the object of your ♥♥l'amour♥♥, no matter how you might object."

Duff link jo anne? Unless I've been foiled. (again <21.44>)

Or are you suggesting I like the odd battleaxe.


Edit 01.39. Sorry jo anne, not a duff link was it.

I was expecting a nice piccy of a certain Yorkshire lass who's found fame with Sainsbury's.


Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Were you codding, Dostaf, or was it a case of your pie's deceiving you? Duff links indeed!

I was going to say poor Christine, then I realised she has impressed you enough to feature alongside your l'amour. By no accident is she a success.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I kid you not jo anne, I initially wrongly jumped to the conclusion that you'd done a double paste. (like I sometimes do)

As for Christine. She's delightfully potty and as mad as a boxer frogs.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Yay! A Rlink and you modestly omitted the R (unlike me).

'delightfully potty' - that has more than compensated for 'odd battleaxe'.

An endearing English *eccentric.

*eccentric -n. odd, un*conventional person

*conventional - synonyms: accepted, common, ordinary..

We all want to be accepted, mostly, but who wants to be common, ordinary?!

*****

2008 was The Year of the Frog - well it was a leap year.

I was going to link to the life-cycle of the frog, but there was **Rfrogs' pawn.

**R Recycled pun (from ww forum)
Notice I was modest enough to admit to it though.
(Not modest enough to omit that it made people - unless they were just being kind.
Either way, it's best not to encourage me.)




Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Christine is a self proclaimed battleaxe jo anne.

Though myself, I think she's more jolly hockeysticks.
And I don't think her hubby's as daft as he acts.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Sorry Dostaf, I didn't know:

Christine is a self proclaimed battleaxe.

Indeed, Christine even became Mrs. British Battleaxe.

"Neil is delighted as he says he’s now married to a new woman."

Both do put on a jolly good show.

In reality, I would not be myself if the cameras were rolling.

Some find it a scream, but it would be my idea of a nightmare.

What about you?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Flipping heck jo anne.

I walked sraight into that little trap.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
You can't insure against them in ww, Dostaf - sorry if you find them tyresome and they drive you spare.

(Tread carefully.)

Moving on ... What do you have on your pancakes?

I like sugar and lemon.

(PS If this helps, I really don't like this mon, but I should probably keep my trap shut.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm with you on the pancakes jo anne.

Lemon and sugar. In my book pancakes have to be sweet.

Anything else would be rather unsavoury.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
It's Pancake Day almost every day at my house.
One of my children would eat them on Shrove Tuesday and in droves on every other day of the year too.

The milk is organic, the eggs free-range and I don't use white flour but wholemeal ... the children like them that way ... now.

They put up with the healthier option.

I never flip my pancakes - a trusty fish slice does the trick. Sugar is only sprinkled sparingly and I always worry about lemon juice squirting in the children's eyes.

All these health & safety issues.
You can imagine the exciting lives my family lead.

And it might even be risky even talking about flipping pancakes in ww.

(I was only joking before - where there's a Will, there's a way to make me smile. He's lovely.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


I love pancakes and my thoughts were purely innocent. The potential for misinterpretations never crossed my mind. (Have you ever met her, nice girl own teeth etc.)

But since you mention it.

Crepe Suzette.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Yes blush, Mr. Dostaf.

I see you're blaming the French again - how mean of you!

They can be quite delightful ... I even partake in them myself in ww.

And, what's worse, I don't even blush.
(I do really.)

Who might I blame? I'm tempted to link to a Cat With A Fishbone et al in ww, but it's all my own naughty work.

And so, to redeem myself, here is an intellectual discussion giving an insight into the serious side of Mr. K. Williams. I found it fascinating.

(Please don't mind me, but carry on being yourself and thinking those purely innocent thoughts.)

(And three photo's of the mill-worker - one with a terribly cheeky comment. (Top row, 6 across))

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Blame (sp) the French jo anne? Moi?

As for KW he certainly was no stone jug.

A lady who doesn't argue?

Possibly

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Give me the liberty to know, to utter, and to argue freely according to conscience, above all liberties. John Milton

How dull the days without daftness and debate. Jo Anne

A good argument can bring people to life. (4 minutes onwards)

I rarely have cause to argue with my good friend, Google, who says:

stone jug is London Cockney rhyming slang for prison
and
milk jug for an easily duped person (mug).

(I hadn't heard of either until I looked up stone jug.)

But I could fall out with another online friend - 22:10.

Very droll.
I've been laughing about it ever since.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
The Dickens link with Victorian fears about using the T word tickled me jo anne.

Re the Hitler stuff.

Voluminous trousers are often referred to as Blackpool Tower pants.

See bracketed part of mein thread title.

PS I too have been chuckling all day about the Mien Holiday Kamph line.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I rarely say the t word, I was brought up to call them pants.

I had noticed (what the brackets contained), Dostaf.

Mein Kampf means My Struggle - my 'O' levels in History and German do come in useful still.

My was actually genuine - I didn't feel comfortable making puns about Hitler.

Hitler giving orders that made nonsense militarily so he could holiday in Blackpool.
***

I wonder what became of the bargee - I've looked, but haven't found it anywhere yet.

I love the word "gongoozler".


Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I did actually hesitate before using that man's name on here jo anne.

Although it is commonplace to make light of evil in times of adversity, perhaps we modern people have no real comprehension of the fear he put into our ancestors.

The fact that it was good old Blackpool added to the levity.

Had it been a more genteel place he had designs on, the attitude would have been no doubt different.

I thought a gongoozler was a berry.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Dostaf, are you saying, "It's better that Devon, you know."

(Hitler did like to hear the cry of Sieg Heil.)

Gongoozler is quite a bamboozler.
If you had a word with canal enthusiasts in Wigan, many would think it berry funny.

Lots of locals love walking/cycling near the canal, but it is often quiet.
The water is quite scummy in places and there is more rubbish floating on it than when I was a lass.

One of my teachers in junior school was a gung-ho gongoozler.
At times he took our class out and we sketched the nearer canal locks.

In secondary school our cross-country route ran mostly along the canal ... the route ran, but I didn't, mostly. Those canal-path hills are killers.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Speaking of scummy water jo anne;

I presume you are familiar with 'Locks and Quays' a local TV show presented by Fred (The Weatherman) Talbot.

If so, you may remember (membermembermember) a certain Womble that neither went underground nor overground.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'm loath to call people scum, but I'll let it wash over me.

I don't remember that certain womble, Dostaf, but I have seen 'rubbishing' (collecting rubbish) going on along the Leeds Liverpool Canal ... now I just see rubbish collecting there.

It's still a peaceful, scenic place with wildlife to watch and watch out for though.
It's just a shame there are no Wigan water wombles.

2009 Words Festival

I haven't been able to give my links a colour up till now - I've seen you do it, Dostaf.
I'm trying putting the (b][/b) (all square brackets) either side of the link title - I have tried at the beginning and end of the link notation, but to no avail.

Yay!

Do you need a more expensive licence to link in colour?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I'm surprised you had problems jo anne.

I know you are now sorted, but this was one of my latest coloured link, for anyone else who may be curious;

Out!!
(From International Pool thread)

Created from this;

(url=https://secure.thelifeguardstore.com/productcart/pc/catalog/60.5Thunderer.jpg](b]Out!!(/b][/url]

NB Curved brackets in red (for illustration), should be square ones [

I have suspected that some folk (new people) aren't actually aware that the underlined words are linked, hence my usual choice of purple lettering.

There's another interesting link in your last post too.

Being a clean sort of Gongoozler myself, your mention of a good wash, has had me scratching my head.

See 'General'.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Yes, even I have problems, Dostaf.

(Where were your (b] before Out!! and (/b] after it - replacing ( with [ for actual links?)

It can be very tricky explaining, but hope no colourful language is evoked.

The underlined links are a little too modest, so it is possible to miss them , as you say.

I've seen General - sorry, I dont know about when the Leeds Liverpool canal 'burst its banks' in the region near the B&Q Superstore.
Hope you're not scratching your head for too long - have you run out of Nit Oil?

I do love the compass in the path a little further away from Wigan - just thought I'd point it out.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Does it look right now jo anne? I think I may have edited it (for the umpteenth time) as you were typing. Those little bracket rascals can be a pain. And you try finding an invisible ink image.

The compass you mention is opposite this.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Yes, it does look right (at last), Dostaf.

I love playing with the brackets etc. in WW.
"Parva leves capiunt animas" as they probably used to say in Wigan.

So now I know the whereabouts of Lime Pond.
That's NEWS to me - thanks for directing me to it, Dostaf. I'll look out for it the next time I'm there.

For invisible ink, it's (ii] (/ii] where ( = [, I think ...

Now you see it,

(Now I just have to work out how you make the last part of the sentence re-appear.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Guess what a certain softlad just attempted jo anne.

I'll be looking in here for gullible next.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I can't see your attempt, Dostaf ...

gull n./vt dupe, fool

There are no (not many at least) flies on you, Dostaf.

Although, you might be able to help out the next time LD need GHGPs.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
It's funny that you should bring flies up jo anne.

Googling Miry Lane sewage pipe Wigan for my flood question got me that.

I gave up trying to find the relevant part as it is very old.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
An interesting subject to swot up on, Dostaf.

You haven't been deluged with information about the flood as yet, but it does seem quiet on ww tonight.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I found the 'A' in R A O B an interesting word.

According to QI (I think) the animal in the image is actually wrong.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
159 Carriage of Disease

"Copeman (1906), In a report to the Local Government Board dealing with epidemic prevalence of infantile diarrhoea at Wigan, says: 'At the Miry Lane Depot there is always stored (awaiting removal by farmers) an enormous amount of night-soil mixed with ashes which, in hot weather especially, is not only exceedingly offensive, but is beset by myriads of house flies. As the result of personal enquiry at the various houses in the neighbourhood in which, during the year 1905, deaths from diarrhea had occurred, I learnt that considerable nuisance from the foul odours was apt to be experienced during the prevalence of hot weather, especially with the wind in the south or southwest, blowing from the Depot to the special area, so much so on occasions as to render it necessary to shut all the windows, while the inhabitants of houses nearest the Corporation Depot stated that at certain times of the year their rooms were apt to be invaded by a veritable plague of flies, which swarmed over everything of an edible nature on the premises. This being so, it would appear not improbable that these flies, some of which have doubtless had opportunity of feeding on and be-coming contaminated with excremental material of human origin, may have been a means of carrying infected material to certain foodstuffs, such, more particularly, as milk and sugar, and so, indirectly, of bringing about infection of the human subject.'

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I had to google R.A.O.B., Dostaf.

I had Noah idea what antediluvian meant.

What should the animal be, do you think?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Cheers for the fly piece jo anne.

I think many people assume the 'A' stands for ancient.

I'm sure that this lad is a bison. And this lad is a buffalo.

A misconception which appears in the song 'Home On The Range'

♪♫♪♫"Oh give me a home, where the buffalo roam....etc"♪♫♪♫♪

I'm pretty sure it was featured on QI.

Incidentally, Mr W Oddie (in what now seems like an antediluvian Goodies book wrote;

"Give me a home where the buffalo roam....


and I'll show you a house with a very messy carpet"
.

Funny how rubbish like that sticks in me head like wotsit to a blanket.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Wigan is ancient, but I'm not sure about antediluvian.

I can't see the water buffalo on my server.

I saw Bill on The Wright Stuff a short while ago, and, from what he said, the antediluvian period would not be interesting in his book.

Rubbish!
It's a good tip to keep ahead and retain all the quips to entertain ww.

WW'ers are not antediluvian or even ancient (unlike many of your jokes).

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I changed him once jo anne (the buffalo, not WO)

Try another.

And here's something for the Brummies.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Who's the bird with him?

They might sewage you, Dostaf!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
They'll have to find my secret address first jo anne, before they can follow this bison line.

They may even offer me a bison crop.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Brummies have ways of making people talk, Dostaf.

There are others who would like to know the whereabouts of your secret headquarters too.

Instead of making enemies who want to make you sing, I suggest an easier and more convivial approach - do not *accentuate others' differences in naughty jest.

I am NOT saying *accent you hate*, I must stress.

(I'm sure you wouldn't like to be sent to elsewhere in the West Midlands either, Dostaf.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Do you think I'd get a warm welcome over in the West Midlands jo anne?

I often wonder who put the oven in Coventry.

It must be something to do with the heat over there. This lass obviously got a bit warm.
Phew.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Yes Dostaf, I think you would be hot in the West Midlands - one and all would bellow 'Hello!'

I often wonder who put the oven in Coventry.

I don't know who was responsible, but at least they thought on and put a vent in it, too.

It also seems there is mystery surrounding Lady Godiva herself in the days gone by, confounded by people making up stories (as people love to do).

How very taxing.

She does seem like a warm-hearted lady, who would not want any Tom, Dick or *harrying.

Lady Godiva is possibly depicted in church windows which shed a little light on her holy respectable character.

I have never visited Coventry, but it seems a place worthy enough not to be ignored.

For Xrh.

Incendentally, Dostaf - the procession was to raise money for ... the Spitfire Fund.

*harrying vt. harrassing

PS Do you think she was one of the first divas -

after issuing a proclamation that all persons should keep within doors and shut their windows, she rode through the town

- bravely without .

Go Lady, Go Diva!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Nakky pictures and divas jo anne? Not very high brow, but I suppose Spring is on it's way.

I don't know if you're familiar with the Dad's Army 'Spitfire Fund' episode, but the way the Town Clerk explained that the lady taking the 'Lady' role would have her modesty protected by "Fleshings"was one of the classic DA lines and is mentioned here.

"The way Eric pronounced the word gave a whole new meaning to it: prim but, at the same time, lascivious. He would roll back his front teeth from his gums and smack his tongue against the roof of his mouth, and out would come the word, with a fine spray of spittle, 'flesh... ings!' ""

Raisinig the tone a little and returning to equestrian statues;

Did you see Mr Fry debunk the myth (popular belief paragraph) about horse-statue legs on QI?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I did watch Dad's Army, but have forgotten much about it.

'flesh... ings!'
(I had to look up lascivious a. lustful )


Spring is almost here, but whether you agree with the Met. Office or tradition, the Wigan weather isn't agreeable with one today.

I missed that particular QI, as I don't legularly watch it, but an actress who I like is appearing this Fryday so I might actually see it.


PS pejorative a. (of words etc.) with disparaging connotation

A Diva is a celebrated female singer.
----->
The term often used to imply that a star is arrogant, difficult to work with, high-maintenance, manipulative, fussy, highly strung, privileged and demanding.

See Semantic change - it reminds me of the 'telegraph pole' you thought of.

Pejoration of meaning: Loss of quality.

Sweetheart --->(shortened to)---> 'theart ---> tart.

PPS I've been on the trail of Walmsley Pond today.

Blimey Charley, there was a lot of legwork involved, but it's good to be able to put a name to a place. Thank you.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Looking at the Little Britain link, I thought you'd put more nakky pictures on for a moment jo anne. I'm not a great fan of the show but it certaiinly seems popular

If you wish to see Ms T in all her glory on QI, I suggest you try to catch QI XL, which I think is screened on Saturday. (it's a repeat but with an extra 15 minutes viewing)

Ms Thompson had her own show in the Eighties (I think), but it didn't catch on.

Speaking of semantics, I can't find nakky pictures, in the nak, or nakky women anywhere. But I can find in the nip etc. aphrase used on 'Father Ted'.

Whenever I hear the word Diva, I never think of dear old Cheshire.

For some reason my rosy fascination turns my thoughts to here. Hence the DD.

So now you know where the lime pond is. There was a time when you could walk around it, but I think it's now fenced off.

At least you can still see the wildlife from the canal towpath though.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
So you think Little Britain isn't Great.
(I'm sure you're not the only guy in the World.)
Many of the catchphrases have certainly caught on, even if we're not all hooked to the comedy series.

I didn't know "The Roman name for Chester was 'Deva'. Named after the goddess of the River Dee. The Roman name was pronounced Dewa because the Romans used the letter V to represent a W."
Of course, the name Chester is derived from the Latin for a Camp 'Castra' - I didn't know that either.

But, we ww'ers do know how your mind operates by now, Dostaf - seeing as you've mentioned Yorkshire whereever the slightest chance arose.

(We can county on you doing it again - it's garretteed.)

Aye up - he's at it again!

You expected to uncover more naked pictures.
Let us bring that subject to a close - it is too naughty.

PS I wouldn't walk round Lime Pond by myself anyway - the canal tow path is just about safe enough.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Yes jo anne i think it's time to return to culture.

All the nakky images will be covered for the time being.

Sorry, I meant covered up.

I must confess to being rather partial to our local ish county towns.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse


What about ... Wigan?

Doesn't it have the wow-factor for you?

I like Manchester and Bolton too.

I love Liverpool too ... that's so last year you might think, but my love will last years anyway.

The River Douglas starts originally from here.
(Wot - not Wigan?!)

We often make a Point of going here and unreservedly run along the sands, but the hills are our dunefall.


I like many places, but can't say there is nowhere I would not like to visit:

No-wear? - No way!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
The naked truth is that I love Wigan jo anne.

Of course it's good to visit other places. But it's also grate to come home.

The coal fire image links nicely to something I saw on the news this week.

During a piece about the miners' strike a local lady recounted the felling of the head-gear towers at Parkside. She said that when "you" saw them coming into view, "you" knew you were home. This is what I've always said about our own Wigan landmarks that are no more. I actually miss them.

Oh, by the way, I recently noticed your first post edit.
I decided to have a google and got a shock

I wont be visiting Newcastle in a hurry.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
(Dostaf, you are far from ^angellic, but why would you be dragged across the coals in Newcastle?)

^Created by the same sculptor as Another Place we have discussed on ww.

I shall return to Wigan later - where is she now you might wonder - but there is a more pressing issue to fairly address here.

Cherchez la femme.

Dumas's character unfairly inferred that no matter what the problem, a woman (one of the fairer sex) will eventually be found at the root of it.

Annie Mosity See the starter post:

animosity - synonyms ... *malevolence

*malevolent a. full of ill will - malevolence n.

I have not read Dumas's 'The Mohicans of Paris', but wonder did Miss Ogeny feature in it?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Never mind ladies and hairstyles missus.

Thanks to your "I just googled and there is one elsewhere.." comment I became curious.

Have you seen the lovely Anna, who claims to be 21 and from Newcastle?

I'm not linking to Anna.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Thanks to your "I just googled and there is one elsewhere.." comment I became curious.

I think you'll find it is of no thanks to me that you became curious.

I did find an Annie Mosity - a username on a forum, but didn't look for further details and also made no link to Anna.

(Edit - ahem - where has your gone?
Later Edit - it's back! Thank you.
Even later Edit - please don't there if it was a mistake in the first place. Thank you.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
When I say curious I mean inquisitive you understand.

She (Anna M) looks like a nice boy actually.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
We don't need to say Anna More about her.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Indeed, back to Wigan please.

Edit put back. It was misplaced in the first place, should have been at the end. But as you clocked it I'll return it.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I saw this from home.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I too saw the owd egg cups bite the dust.

It's only by seeing photo's on here that you remember how big they were. Someone posted a photo taken on the old railway by Scotman's flash with them in the background.

I loved the way the colour seemed to change on them according to the weather. Very dark when wet, but bright when the sun shone on them. Flipping heck, I'm waxing lyrical about what many would consider an eyesore.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Please see 9th Mar 00:02.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Never mid jo anne. Have another.

Or even two (or is that now three)

One day I may become reckless and throw in a couple of {:W] s.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
The cooling towers were a distinctive part of the Wigan skyline we could see from home. One of my family now lives very close to Fiddlers Ferry.

I love this high soar.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
NB - No s in my last post.
Misplaced or otherwise.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Booger trapped again jo anne. One of the Fiddlers' towers came down in a gale some years ago.

There was a 999 SOS type show which featured the air ambulance in Yorkshire. they attended a pile-up on the M62 near the power station at Selby after a hailstorm. The road was clear in either direction not far away. They said the towers actually affected the weather. Fiddlers often seems to be a cloud factory.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Fiddlers often seems to be a cloud factory.
It certainly seems they may account for some of the clouds in the Warrington skies
(More steamy pictures arose I see, Dostaf.)

What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?
A perennial favourite of ours (mine) whenever we pass Fiddlers Ferry.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
You could be asking the wrong person that one jo anne.

But go on, I don't know, what did the big chimney say to the little chimney?

PS I can't find anything about the towers affecting weather. apart from one forum comment about "Power Station Snow" in Yorkshire. The TV prog was "Helicopter Heroes" (ep 11)

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
It isn't risky at all.

It's a clean-ish joke - not risque as would soot some.

What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?

... You're too small to smoke.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Now I've had piff paff puff in my head earlier. (Wrongly I might add)

.....Edit ... ............ ............... ..... ..... ..... ...... ...... ..........^^^^

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Are you a bit dotty tonight, Dostaf?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


I couldnt get me Red Arrows under The Great Soprendo.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I will point out ^there is no need to ^

^ ^^^

The WW Red Arrows are newly-formed and just need more practice.

^^ ^^

Have they got a motto?: Éclat.

^^^ ^

Now I've had piff paff puff in my head earlier. (Wrongly I might add)

.....Edit ... ............ ............... ..... ..... ..... ...... ...... ...^^^^

Whoops - they flew in their undercoat that time.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I was trying to stick my arrows under the Great Soprendo jo anne.

All this talk of chimneys had me thinking of puffs of smoke.

Piff paff puff was Mr Victoria Wood's catchphrase. I wrongly previously brought it to mind when I heard of Ali Bongo's death earlier today.

A very clever man by all account.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I hadn't heard that Ali Bongo has died. It seems he excelled in doing what he loved for the best part of his life, which is magic.
****

A mischievous magician who is stacks of fun for children.

****

As a daft aside - I've been shopping for cards today and found some delightfully humorous pundigrions.

Unfortunately, I didn't need a 'Thank You' card, but I'll sheepishly admit I loved the card with 'Thank Ewe' on the front and 'Baaaaa very much' inside. (The sheep was a lovely character too.)
There is money to be made with puns - we should take care of our (better) originals - they could cause a furore.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


I hope you're not suggesting what I think you are jo anne.

Punning for money?

We'd be called Charlotans . Or something very similar.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Punning for money

Yes, I was suggesting that, Dostaf.
I just wonder why you disapprove?

There is no shame in well-earned pun money.

We could be on to a write winner.
(Spot the ball pun).

Having a pun Rtime and making money to boot.


Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Are you honestly saying we should peddle our R wares on the
open market jo anne?

PS Did you keep your eye on the ball and spot the location of the last link?

One mon wrote a ballad about another location there.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I know: "The Orlons made South Street famous with the lyrics of their 1963 hit 'South Street'."

Philadelphia


This reading mon scored a literary hat trick , - and it just so happuns he's appearing at
*Waterstones, Saturday 21st March at 1pm*.

PS It's sad to see the Wiend Children's Library all boarded up.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'm skirting round that , Dostaf.

Thinking back to this Rlink ...

Did you know there is a Terminal Building in Wigan?

Built originally in 1777 by The _ & _ _ Co.
Rebuilt in 1984 by Albert Leonard Gibson (I think).

If you haven't got a clue, then here is one for you:

There is a very up-to-date image of the building on WW (but this might keep you in the dark for now).

PS Are you now sold on the idea of doing something punny for money?
(If there was anyone charitable enough to pay for our puns.)

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Yes jo anne. I know it.

I remember it being partially removed.

It was ruthlessly left roofless for a while before it was saved. I'm sure there was a convenient place at the opposite end to the arches. I may be wrong though.


Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Here's a photograph of the Terminal Building - it reminds me of this house.

Built originally in 1777 by The Leeds & Liverpool Canal Co., here is the up-to-date WW image.

I don't remember the Terminal Building when derelict, Dostaf.
I didn't even know its name until today when reading the plaque on its wall - the other side of the building to that shown on ww's webcam.

I don't know about the public conveniences.

I'm off to sell my puns now.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I don't know if I should worry about you jo anne.

Bur you do seem awfully keen on selling your goods.

I wouldn't like to see you on the slippery slope to the seedy world of punstitution.

I wonder if there is an institution for punstitutes?

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Worry ye not, Dostaf.

I'm off out tonight, but will be quite punderstated.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Hope you have a good un jo anne.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Thank you, Dostaf.
We all had a good evening out, but not one pun have I sold.

Though one pun I have stole.

There was a sign in Liverpool city centre saying Busk Stop.
(Had it have been Pun Stop there might have been no stopping me.)

This a.m., Adam and Joe requested homemade humorosities, but unhelpfully for free.

A&J also had the audible audacity to freely give the game away:

'What is it about sometimes not being able to get rubbish wordplay out of your mind?'

'Well, it's because it's fun.'


I hope this **doesn't get out - it might encourage ... competition.
**That I heard A&J is sound proof that it did.

PS There are institutes for prosestitution and poetrytution to book.

Punstitution - I wish I had a body of work worth selling.
I worry I haven't, as yet.
Please cheer me on.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Going by your puntuation (and previous comments) you are obviously a fan of Lennon and Lennonland jo anne.

As for being a punstitute; going commercial would take some of the fun out of punning

Also, what about writer's block?

That would put the brakes on entering the commercial vicinity.

And what of the time wasters like these gentlemen browsers? "Just looking". They remind me of those beggars who use supermaket news stands as libraries. I reach politely past them.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
*Warning - nakky picture

I love not only Liverpool, but lots of other locations too.

And I can't imagine why you would think I think a lot of John, Dostaf - I shall try to be more discreet in future.

A great artist who thought and shared,
Ideally cared,
And *bared (a bit too much)
Good with words,
Good to be heard,
And who dared to try,
But did not think he was always right.

I could go on about John, but I'll stop.
****

I see. Right then.
Or rather don't write then.

You've certainly put paid to me punning for pounds.

Such a good job of encouraging me - I find myself at one block and you spur me on by putting another before me.
It's a good job I'm only playing.

Although, a red light to one, can signal the go ahead to another.

Where's the police when you need them?

Standing browsing at supermarket newspaper stands - I won't stand for it!
My cheeky sister and husband readfully take no notice of me though.

PS I see you would be made up to meet Ms. Moss.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
You may be interested in this tale jo anne.

As you seem hell-bent on hawking your prose, I felt it only wise to point out the cons.

Incidentally, would encourage your endeavour rather than give the idea the chop.

PS Speaking of browsing. The nakky picture was a bit of a let down.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I lived in student accommodation in Gateacre, just a bit North of Woolton - pretty posh parts of Liverpool - for a few months.

But I felt homesick at 22(!) so commuting commenced :
a ten minute bus ride, forty minute train journey then half an hour walk and I was miles happier.


Liverpool's beautiful parks are worth a mention:

Both Calderstones and Sefton
would make Mesnes green with envy, but Wigan just hasn't got the space.

(I lived in another part of Liverpool, not quite so posh, for two years when first married.)

PS Sorry the *nakky picture was a disappointment.
*I find this one quite tateful.
And John's painting quite amuseing.

And thank you for the encouragement and for pointing out the possible pitfalls of punning for pay instead of play.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Ecky le peck jo anne. (as they say in far away lands)

Your punning for money enterprise is one thing.

But;

Are these folk bunging you a fair wedge for that tower of plugs?



Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Are these folk bunging you a fair wedge for that tower of plugs?

I'll quickly put a stop to that idea, Dostaf.

I just love Liverpool.
I've certainly said my tuppence worth about it.

Any road, I wander why pots and kettles spring to mind.)
... I hope you don't get a cut from your Tykeland talk.

PS Hello! I see you've been mischievous - I won't let you get away with that one.

If you can't be kind, please (she pleas) keep your own council.

Let's decree not to decry.

It's time to shout about Wigan and all the belting, appealingthings about our borough.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Shocking, absolutelely shocking.

A cut from that lot ( I know ), you say?

Have you been on something missus?

This is the only cut from Tykeland I'm into.

PS Well spotted re the mischievous link. I knew there was no clue in the link address. So it was a fair cop.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Well spotted re the mischievous link. I knew there was no clue in the link address...

It was no big feet of observation, Dostaf.
The link location was pair-fectly apparent to me as we used to take our children to the 'Mischief' shop. Of all the photographs to shoes, he thinks!

(No mischief is soled - our children are adept at making their own.)

Of course I have been on something, but not ferry recently. *Unlike my sister and her family, who could not have been appier.
Funnely enough, all thanks to someone's good suggestion (insistence) to go - whose, I frogget.

*My clan had a wonderful time.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
My word jo anne, you were brave to risk such an expedition.

A trip there sounds like a shoe safari.

Do they still bart er, or is cash the norm.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Leave it out.

"Do they still barter, or is cash the norm."

Please give all the places in our borough credit where it is due,
don't discredit them.

An ex-*pedition - not really.
Leigh isn't that far away for us.
And we saved on shoe leather for sales of shoe leather (but not on tyre treads.)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ped- (Sorry, I can't link to it.)
*associated with children and foot.

Watch what you do - do you not worry you will put your foot in it yet again!

Those Leythers will tan your hide - I'd duck and I'd hide if I were you.

(I wonder, Kenya be the 'Lesser Spotted Dostaf'?
So rarely sighted/sited/cited, that people outside of WW haven't seen nor even heard of him.)

(So-far-he has got away with wit, but what happens if they catch up with him... )

To be continued ...

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Cont.

Hide thought of saying, 'Beware the Ides of March,' but, with Ides-sight, I now know it is too late for that.

But I don't think it is too late for seeing:

Beavers - the hides of Martin Mere.

"Beavers, the world's second largest rodent, are one of nature's engineers excavating *canals and building dams and lodges of branch and earth."

*Naturally, they are not just of interest to gongoozlers.

"Entirely vegetarian, the beavers are members of the Vegetarian Society..."

Don't you think there are some daft people about!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Don't worry about any reception I may receive in Lobbieland jo anne. I know them well

They have been the butt of many of my jokes for years. And vise versa I might **add.

I've even been known to socialise with them.

The beaver tale is a good one. I wonder if one day they'll spread to Wigan?


** Image reproduced by kind permission of Lord St Laptops.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse


Unlike you, I am not all that familiar with Leigh, Dostaf.

Apart from spending enjoyable times at Pennington Flash and spending money at a shoe shop.

Affectionate terms such as Leythers and Lobbieland are relatively new to me.

As you just jest, I suggest it's likely you like this lady and these ladies too.


It would be magic having beavers in Bottling Wood - Martin Mere's beavers and baby (is-he Wizzy?) look wonderful wildlife to watch. (It'll be a dam sight easier there than in the wild).

A gongoozler link.

There are now lovely new signposts along the canal towpaths - about time too!
They point out nearby places and give approximate times taken to reach them by ^bike.

^Is it on your bike to walkers then?

I don't know if you heard about this business, but I noticed a post about it yesterday.
On a forlorn fallen fence post, not far from the scene, someone had penned:

'Note to self - next time I'll pinch a Fiesta'.

Great graffiti. .

PS Have you seen this?

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Not familiar with Leythers jo anne? Then I feel it's only right that I should give you a few pointers

Leythers (their proud description of themselves) don't always seem pleased to see Wiganers and often struggle to hide this.. Some learned people put this down to the fact that they had to shoulder the indignity of being directed from a higher place.

The Lobby-Gobbler name is probably a retort to their 'Pie Eater' slurs.

more follows

Although they talk like us there are a few things you should know.

They ofter use the phrase/word barnt.

Don't worry, this only indicates an intent to do something.

"I'm barnt have lobbies for me tea" or "If I win t'lottery I'm barnt bey owse i wiggin" Are phrases often heard

Also, it's worth noting that words containing arry are pronounced erry. So, Barry becomes berry, marry becomes merry and so on.


In short, I use the following coping mechanism:

Leythers aren't Tykes,
Tykes aren't Southerners, Southerners aren't French and
the French aren't Leythers.

The beaver story is good news, but I wonder if we'll ever see these chaps near the JJB.

RE the canal links, do you remember this? The flood occurred here. So if they attempt to harness the power of the bywashes, they'd better keep them unclogged.

Oh, I almost forgot. The "ladies" you mentioned can sling their hooks.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Thank you for your helpful pointers, Dostaf.

The "ladies" you mentioned can sling their hooks.

I'd say, and you can quote me on this, it is just these "characters" that can sling their hooks.

(You knew I was ^barnt tell you off about that comment, Dostaf.)

^barnt - colloquial for bound to(?) - was/is often said where I grew up in our borough.
So, I think, its usage might be nowhere nearly as restricted as you thought.

Thank you also for sharing your cop*ing mechanism.
I won't be copying it - *here I add y:

Someone dear to me was originally from Yorkshire - how-den can I not like Tykes?
Some of my family are Southerners.
And Ooh la la! - I love frogs!


To sum up, I think:

Where a person comes from adds to, rather than detracts from, who they are.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
PS I ot-ter point out that a sign on the canal towpath points to the stadium and depicts it is only one minute away (by bike).
Though otters like to play and romp about, if I suggested they cycle I suspect they'd say, 'Pack it in.'

Your idea is lovely, but I'd like to put a holt to their stay near the stadium, Dostaf.
Otters eat ... frogs.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


I did a spot of armchair gongoozling earlier jo anne and thought of your recent posts.

Mr Craven was on a steam boat named Otter discussing past deliveres of coal to Belvoir Castle (pronounced beaver)

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I like John, but I missed Countryfile today, Dostaf.

Did you see the item on geocaching a few weeks or so ago?
Sorry, I can't find the actual footage with Michaela.

Geocaching is outdoor treasure-hunting where participants use GPS to find containers full of “treasure”, but the pleasure is in the chase.

It's even happening here!

And this writely, or wrongly, made me think of starting a ww geocach game - without GPS.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I hadn't heard of that jo anne.

Could bee rather costly though.

I prefer the chalky Wigan version.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
A cache must be carefully hidden, Dostaf.

This was downwrite entertaining, but I'll be a bit of a kiljoy by saying (and please mark my words) that kind of 'cache' would be soon wiped out.


I agree, the geocaching could prove too dear, even with clever marqueting not taking off. (Of ^course, ww'ers are not stingy).

^1:50 onwards - an idea which does not require splashing (and stashing) too much cache.

*Log books* - finders write their name in them to prove they have found the cache.

We could have a hidden book(s) + pens and give clues to their whereabouts on ww - if a ww'er searched for and discovered one, they could write their username in the book, before re-hiding it.

Of course, there are caches with this plan ....

Would you still say, 'Geo-ver?' and think this idea should be shelved?

PS (25/3) Further to:
On a forlorn fallen fence post, not far from the scene, someone had penned:

'Note to self - next time I'll pinch a Fiesta'.


The fallen fence post has since 'fallen' into the canal, complete with the concrete it was embedded in, so that it is almost upright. You can see the top of the post and make out the fiesta of the graffiti.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
After watching that clip jo anne, I think geocacheing (sp) looks interesting and not just the preserve of the upwardly mobile.

Perhaps it will catch on with guide and scout groups etc.

If you look at the bank opposite to where the bus went, but not too far from the railway bridge you may still be able to see the remnants of a wooden structure.

If you can, It's what's left of another pier.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I'll see if I can see it, Dostaf.
(It must be in a sorry *staithe if it's still there.)

*'Staithe' means landing place, or quay.

I've noticed the pier is not well-preserved.

Tomato thought it would be restored given how WLCT are going to town with the cobbles on the bridge near the pier.

It was rotten luck that the pit brow lass and boat builder disappeared.
(I still haven't seen the bargee - I wonder where ee is while about my Wigan waterway wanderings.)

I agree; plainly-speaking, geocaching has exciting possibilities and could well take off in Wigan. It's like high-tech orienteering.



This man is one of the main men in Mesnes Park.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Update:

I e-mailed WLCT - to see where the bargee could be:

To confirm that the Bargee Sculpture is at Changeline Bridge (opposite Orwell Pub) at Wigan Pier.

It is however currently closed off as there are works taking place on the Bridge.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
I nearly put staithe jo anne.

I don't know if it can still be seen.

In the warmer months the bank will probably be too overgrown to notice.

Good news about the remaining statues by the way.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I looked for the other pier yesterday Dostaf, but didn't spot it. If it is still there, I think the reeds may be hiding it.
****

A bit of nonsense from John lennon's book:
In His Own Write

Alec Speaking

He is putting it lithely when he says
Quobble in the Grass,
Strab he down the soddieflays
Amo amat amass;
Amonk amink a minibus,
Amarmylaidie Moon,
Amikky mendip multiplus
Amighty midgey spoon.
And so I traddled onward
Careing not a care
Onward, Onward, Onward.
Onward, my friends to victory and glory for the thirtyninth.


And for Spring - A.A. Milne's:

Daffodowndilly

She wore her yellow sun-bonnet,
She wore her greenest gown;
She turned to the south wind
And curtsied up and down.
She turned to the sunlight
And shook her yellow head,
And whispered to her neighbour:
'Winter is dead.'


Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Tell them off jo anne. Naughty lot.

The remains were on top of the concrete kerbing.

I was told that many a fly boat had sailed from there.

Nice poems to welcome the Summer.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Re. A pier - it might reappear in winter - one might reseasonably expect.
I can always hold out till its wintry cold out again.

Me barge along and tell the water weeds off! People think me *daft enough already.

Of course, some do have the bared face beak to habitatually sing their praises. Reedly rude!

*I have been cheerfully chatting to my dog, daftly forgetting about people possibly being behind the B&Q fence.
My candid canine moments are one thing ... how would people react if I remonstrated with the reeds?
Where would it all lead?

PS John Lennon said of Liddypool:

Shout Airborne is handly for places if you like

That the airport was re-named after him spekes volumes about how highly John Lennon is thought of.

PPS

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Nowt wrong with talking to animals jo anne.

"♪♫♪♫ And God I kno..ow I'm one♪♫♪♫"

Those new signs look the part. I hope they'll last.

Forgive me if I lower the tone a little, but I got a gon-googling about sewage. (The "other pier" was for that.)

I remembered F Dibnah being on this. I also remembered reading about Manchester sludge boats being beautifully presented on the MSC, despite their function. (no pun intended. note pre MSC solution)

My gon-googling found this.


Not everyone's cup of tea perhaps. But social history to me.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
no pun intended.
And why not?!

You weren't lowering the tone at all.

Social history is interesting.
From that wikipedia page, I looked up Great Man Theory.

"Many historians believe that a history which only follows around single persons, especially when their significance is determined primarily by political status, is a shallow view of the past, and that sometimes such a view excludes entire groups of people from being parts of the study of history. A broader view is provided by a people's history approach."

We're all in this together.

note pre MSC solution
-prior to the construction of the canal this had been dumped directly into the Irwell!
Irwell, at least that is all water under the bridge now.

(1974 Davyhulme Sewage Treatment Works -
"A stench by any other name is still a stench.")

Information available online is amazing, people have worked hard and achieved much.

Time *flies, and there is still much to be done.

*Terminal buildings are mentioned.

There are still 73 beaches in Great Britain where raw or semi-filtered human sewage is pumped into the sea.

Staithes is in a poor state.

Definitely not anyone's preferred sup of sea.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Great men.

These were strong smells, about which everybody knew except the people being paid to know. They made sure that they kept a long way off. The report talked about a complaint in 1966 and again in 1967 and said that ASP1 went out of action, and that caused it. I do not know what "ASP1" means; all I know is that there was a smell!

The report continued: At the beginning of October 1969, sludge for marine disposal was received from an outside local authority, in this case Bury"—

§ Mr. Frank R. White (Bury and Radcliffe) Oh!



Not funny really.

I have often wondered what the water quality must have been at Blackpool-Sur-Mer at the height of it's popularity.

I wonder if that was what these were really for?

After-all they didn't have these to keep the (ahem) sand from between thir toes as they walked down the beach

If you've ever gongoozled here you'll have seen the farm below.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
"...I received a long report from the Middle Mersey Effluent Treatment Unit which really was absurd. It talked about "allegations of odour". These were not allegations. These were strong smells, about which everybody knew except the people being paid to know. They made sure that they kept a long way off. The report talked about a complaint in 1966 and again in 1967 and said that ASP1 went out of action, and that caused it."

There seems to be an Hansard for everything - even if it stinks.

The information on Mr. GJ Fowler was interesting - he was bestowed with quite an honour.

Whoops - I was making a gravy error there: mixing up Bovril with bestow.

This flipping link was a flop - your gon-googling left me ^high and dry.

(^The Pontcysyllte aqueduct towers 126 feet above the River Dee - I haven't ever gone gongoozling there.)

Btw Henry Gee was mayor of Chester in 1540. He cancelled the Traditional Shrove Tuesday football game and replaced it with a horse race. His surname is where we get the informal name for race horses - 'Gee Gee's'.

I know it aint really linked to gongoozling or sewage, but I will try to get round that to keep you on Merseyside:

You can fly around the fences without the fear of falling here..

PS - Re. The Pontcysyllte aqueduct
- from what you say, it seems to be a cut above the *cesspit.

*I'm not sure if cesspit is the correct terminology for sewage farms.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Have you any more horsey information jo anne.

You'll be going from punster to pundit next.

I'm not much of a gambler. But I don't mind any of these tips

And the only tactics I know are these.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
A helpful tip - be careful with those tactics. (*What an actor or cat!)

"Running around a table full of hot things can be dangerous. As shown in one of the funniest Charley ads. The scalded cat cracks me up every time."
****

I Rrarely have a ^flutter, Dostaf.

(^From here - beautiful photo's)

So, I'll never be a Pundit.
And I can't be counted on for tactics - my word, I would mix anyone up.

But I will wisely say:

"You don't need bags of money to be happy.
And bags of monkey's will soon have you dancing."

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
PS Here's a clue for my prediction.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Poor old Charley. You shouldn't laugh jo anne.

I hope you noticed how he often came a cropper while the kid got away scot free.

I'll just say agents and contracts. Not me.

I got your prediction. Which now means I'm in a predicament.

I won't start a new ** habit though.

Then again. What if?


** Contains nuns.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
if

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
... is a very big word, so I gave it a post all to itself.

(I see you risked fitting it in one post - with other words as well. That was a gamble. )

Here I'll safely ad some of your *favourite things.

There was neither science nor art involved in the making of my prediction. This happuned to make me think of the saying, 'Always coming up smelling of roses' ... looking at the race **runners I picked a name linked to roses.

It might be a bit of a lucky guess.

Of course, it is equestrian of chance.

*contains nuns (artificial)
**contains a nun/cracker

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Neither science nor art jo anne?

You'd have me bet my bottom dollar
on a mere punt?


I think I may just box clever instead.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Boxing clever?!

I'll ask you for pointers in future.


Edit: Mon Mome and first mon home - Liam Treadwell.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Well I suppose it's now safe to comment jo anne

I did indeed get a handle on your tip and I must confess to being sorely tempted. (contd)

I was also concerned that in the event of your prediction being a good un I may have ended up regretting not having had a bet

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
My tip was rubbish, Dostaf.
I shod have kept my trap shut.

Good gongoozling news:

I've found the bargee.
He's on Changeline Bridge (just to the left of the photo'), looking over the wall across to *here.

*Where stables were once sited.

He's a cheery caricature with an interesting panel of very well-presented information.
(It's a shame the sculptures and panels weren't around when the Way We Were was.)

There is bad news about the bargee though.
He has a sizeable crack at the back of his head and in his back.
He stands amidst rubbish too and there's smashed glass near him.

It was still great to see him.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Aye jo anne dump the tipping lark


Siting the bargee near the nightclub is surely asking for trouble?

Speaking of 'The Way We Were' and it's demise. I was reminded of it when this came on the news the other evening.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
dump the tipping lark

It is a safe bet I will, Dostaf.

Siting the bargee near the nightclub is surely asking for trouble?

So it would appear ... though it may not have been nightclubbers who were responsible for the damage or rubbish.

PS 'The Way We Were' - it was sad to see it go.

Happy Eastertime.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Happy Eastertime to you also jo anne.

Which, incidentally is a sad reminder of one of my visits to TWWW.

The visit was great. Even the refreshments at Mr Blair's place were palletable for a change.

I think it was on a Good Friday (could have been the Monday) Sadly it's now gone.

I say visits (plural) as I went around three or four times. Many folk I know, never went once.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
How's aboat that then?!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Excellent

Well done bikeride.

Shame about the duck. Hope he was OK.

That is one item of litter I can not walk by.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
No - we always cut those up.

Edit - Sorry, I only saw the duck after your comment - I'd just noticed the bargee on the Blogs' homepage.

Trees are my bug-bear too. Not smashing to see about.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Speaking of trees, jo anne.

One of the biggest causes of dischuffment to me, is dead and discarded items on the streets at the end of January.

Always a sad reminder that the festive cheer has gone.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
I don't really pine fir Christmas time, Dostaf.

It doesn't really bug me, but I like everyday days when happy things happen as much as special occasions.
(If you know what the Dickens I'm on about.)

I can't believe how soon this present time has arrived.

PS This reminded me of a winning production I saw a few years ago at Wigan Little Theatre.

I haven't been for ages, but the musical this Summer looks fun:

Little Shop of Horrors
Wednesday 17th - Saturday 27th June 2009

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Do you now jo anne, while I was quick to crow about repeated visits to TWWW. I'm sorry I can't say the same for WLT.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
You were rightly chuffed to have visited The Way We Were, Dostaf.

Though it is only Little, do not overlook Wigan's great theatre.

I've seen a good number of plays there.

Keep watching and waiting and *one may turn up that you don't want to miss.

*You missed it yesterday!
7th Dec 2008 at 23:46

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
How strange jo anne.

Yesterday I couldn't catch (google) that bus for another thread and you bring it up.

Not only that, but I nearly mentioned a Nearest & Dearest catchphrase RE WLT.

I was going to say "I've been" with a N&D link.

I decided not to do so thinking it was too far before your time. I forgot that we'd discussed the show here. (7th Dec 2008 at 23:46)

Weird.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Not so weird, Dostaf.

"*one may turn up that you don't want to miss.

*You missed it yesterday!

7th Dec 2008 at 23:46"

(*I read your post where you mentioned you couldn't catch site of the bus and remembered your previous link to it here.)

Nearest & Dearest was before my time.
However, I've been acquainted with it before on ww - 23rd Nov 2008 at 19:53 and 20:02.

But I have to own up.
I too have sometimes missed a comment/*witticism in your posts on my first reading.

*Look who is amongst the Famous Wits.

And there have been a few occasions where I've read a post and thought, 'I was going to put that!'

Copy Cat!

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Yes jo anne. Probably not weird just coinsidental.

It's probably similar to when you learn a new word and it seems to crop-up regularly.

I'm surprised Ringo featured on the list of wit.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Ringo took some stick, but he was not dull and helped keep The Beatles going.

"Starr's affable nature and sad, expressive face provided a strong counterpoint and complement to the other group member personalities. This same quality was an essential element in the group's celebrated wit and collective comic persona. He was later a calming, cohesive force when group tensions and conflicts arose."

A tentacular link follows:

Octopuses also have eight arms, and are highly intelligent, likely more so than any other order of invertebrates. One of their defences is (writefully) a closely garden secrete - so keeping predators in the dark.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Hey up jo anne, there's a turn-up.

Octopi don't have tentacles after all.

Never mind, it won't stop the corny quips about poorly marine life.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Yes, octopodes have arms rather than tentacles all along, yet are all eight-footed! You have to hand it to them for being cleverly confusing with suckers.

(It is too harmless a mistake to worry about, but I wish I had six quid for every time someone said an octopus had tentacles ...
they only have eight.)

Re: cycling toilet issue...

dave© found a cracking link:

Above all, though, we need to talk about this issue. There are serious environmental considerations at issue. The fact that it is so difficult even to mention this subject is down to our Victorian prudishness...
This should be the next area where massive environmental gains can be made with very little downside, except for Kimberley Clark and those irritating puppies that waste a forest of trees in every Andrex advert.


Due to our social history, we are too ply-t to talk of sheets - 'tis a delicate tissue. That's why I'm a bit flushed.

We ought to put all that behind us.

Then toilet rolls may soon be wiped out.

(You might save *one for posterity - but not for posteriority.)

*Handy if The Antiques Roll Show visits Wigan in the future.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse


Sorry to lower the tone again but that reminds of a Roman solution.



It was either this mon, or this mon who visited an ancient facility and suggested a meaning for the phrase "getting hold of the wrong end of the stick".


It involved some sticks, some sponges and some vinegar. Not a puppy in sight.

Posted by: (inactive) Report abuse
Ugh, Dostaf.



I'll stick to toilet rolls and be kind to my mind.

Those puppies make a good job of advertising a product for unpleasant purpose. I say, roll on their next advert.

I can't find a clip of either Fred or Adam discussing ancient *faecal facilities. Aghh! Quick - 'Here, puppy, puppy'! Phew, that's a relief.

A visit to Adam Hart Davies' home really could be the slashed straw.
If you've got to go, you've rot to grow.

(*Sorry - where there's muck, there's brass.)

Not the best subject to get bogged down in.

Bad news:
The mill worker no longer has a hand holding her jackbit - vandals have sawn to that.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
Whoops - I've never had that happen before.

-
I'll own up to the above being all my own work.

But I can't edit any of it, even if I wanted to.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse



I thought you was incognitoil for a moment there jo anne.

Shame about the vandalsim.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
It is a lousy thing to happen to the sculpture, Dostaf.

Not worth losing sleep over, but still - it's not fair.

This poor chap has been vandalised again too. His front has been painted which makes many people see red.

Posted by: dostaf (inactive) Report abuse
Nothing is sacred these days jo anne.

At least owd FSP is made of strong stuff.

Unlike this.

Posted by: jo anne (23914)  Report abuse
What a turn up for the
books, Dostaf.

(I am aghast at what happened at a